


On Home Soil

by saye0036



Category: James Bond (Craig movies), James Bond (Movies), James Bond - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Character Death, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Kidnapping, Original Character Death(s), Sexual Content, Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-27
Updated: 2017-06-11
Packaged: 2018-10-24 15:24:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 33,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10744437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saye0036/pseuds/saye0036
Summary: On Home SoilM is taken after a briefing and Bond races to her aid.This is written in first person and deals with Bond's internal musings about how he actually feels about M since Skyfall.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [detectivecaz](https://archiveofourown.org/users/detectivecaz/gifts), [bufan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bufan/gifts), [tayryn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tayryn/gifts), [Lilibet2](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lilibet2/gifts), [yaner](https://archiveofourown.org/users/yaner/gifts).



> This is inspired by my Desolation drabbles and a stand alone second act of my story Medea.
> 
> Six months after Skyfall. Also I would like to note that in all my stories I consider the character of M to be under 65 years of age, even if the actress playing the character was older by the time of Skyfall in 2012. In this particular story M did not die at Skyfall, the injury was only a superficial hit to the hip.

 

 

 

* * *

**Chapter 1**

I drove to work, listening to the end of a book that I began on my mission. It was a mystery and I had to find out if my hunch on who killed the duchess was correct. It ended just as I turned into the carpark. I was correct and the lover did do it!

I walked into headquarters late, passing through security from the carpark. There was a sense of urgency within the building, meaning that something was up. Perhaps M was just on the warpath for some reason, another international crisis likely.

I will find out in a few hours at my debrief but I'm sure that for once it has nothing to do with me and my mission.

I headed directly to medical as instructed after getting back late from Botswana after spending three weeks in boredom tracking down some stolen arms. I have nothing but a few scratches for once, which makes this trip to medical an unnecessary waste of time.

Tanner was to meet me for a preliminary debrief, something that we had begun doing to prepare me for what kind of mood M was in from my in field reports. Or for him to quickly jot down my verbal report when I had been 'less than professional during my mission', as M said. Tanner usually met me at medical while I was undergoing my mandatory examination that M had insisted that all the 00 agents have, post mission.

Tanner failed to meet me.

I endured the hour of nurses and doctors testing my reflexes and taking blood and then hit the gym. There were people whispering in the halls and stopping the moment I came near.

They looked surprised to see me here and that was troublesome. I was about to ask someone what the hell was going on when I climbed on the treadmill and noticed 005 beside me. "Thomas." I said nodding to him.

"Bond. I'm surprised you're here and not in the midst of this disaster. Then again they don't want our agents lighting up London under these circumstances. I just hope the old gal manages alright."

It was as if a switch went off in my head as I hit the button for the telly on the wall across from the treadmills and the BBC news displayed some sort of incident on the street outside Whitehall. My heart leaping to my throat pounding as if I'd been running on the treadmill for forty minutes.

"M?" Knowing who he meant by 'old gal' I searched the headlines after climbing down from the treadmill. There was an incident and apparently the unnamed female involved was M.

"I know. I've never heard of any department head who can get herself in hot water as fast a M can. Look Bond...I already offered to help but Tanner and Q kicked me out of the office. MI5 is on this as well as about 3 different other agencies, army, police and security for Whitehall."

"So what...we just sit here? Who was she meeting and what the hell happened?"

"From what I overheard from Q, M had just left a meeting with the PM and Minister of Defence after a cabinet session and was headed outside to her car, when the group attacked. Whitehall was locked down tight as a result."

"Tanner wasn't with her?"

"No...dentist apparently."

"I'm going!" I headed for the change rooms and Thomas called out to me. "Wait Bond! I will come as back up."

"Hurray the hell up then! I'm heading up to see Tanner."

He followed me into the change room and hit the shower, while I got quickly dressed. I have to admit that a certain amount of panic was rising within me.

No wonder the office was on edge. M was in the centre of a dangerous situation on home soil and there was nothing we could technically do about it. That sure as hell hasn't stopped me before and it won't now.

I headed up towards the offices, all the while remembering the disaster that was Skyfall. My mind churns with the notion that I will never see her again. Never get to tell her...exactly how I feel about her. M almost dying at Skyfall had changed everything.

I remembered it all in flashes...flashbacks really, as if it were a war. I suppose it was a war of sorts. An old war between Silva and M, and a new one between Silva and me, over M.

I remember the feeling...that dread...fatigue...the smoke...the pain in my lungs...the cold icy water of the loch and the adrenaline from killing Silva. It dissipated the moment she collapsed in my arms. The image of her as she swooned, still bombarded my unfortunate, yet frequent fevered dreams of that night.

The hot sting of tears on my cold face as she seemed to die in my arms. A loss that I had never dreamt of. In all honesty it was more painful than losing Vesper. It echoed the memory of my loss, all those years ago of my parents.

" _At least I did one thing right."_

I realized then that I loved her like no other woman. She was more than just my domineering boss, she was my father and mentor, she was the only one I ever wanted approval from, if not love. M was never my mother figure...never. That would be far too much murky water to dive into.

If it hadn't been for Q and Tanner sending backup...off the books...she would be dead now and it would have been my bloody fault! I would be going through the motions or on a death mission, trying to cope with the loss of her from my life. But Tanner got her to the Glencoe hospital in time. It had been touch and go for a while but thank god she was strong enough to pull through.

I realized that my feelings for M had changed in those moments at Skyfall, from revered respect for her position as M, to something far closer to love. It was a sudden, yet gradual change really. An oxymoron to be sure, but as she fell into my arms bleeding I began to analyse our past interactions and relationship. The acceptance of these feelings for her did not come easily.

I can honestly say I never expected to fall in love with my boss, or any woman over twenty years my senior but I had. It took the last six months to figure this out. The constant night terrors about losing her at Skyfall and seeing her every day while she recovered falling in love was the only logical reason.

The only problem was that she didn't know. At least I didn't think that she knew. I would have hoped that she would have guessed that the reason I was on short term missions since Skyfall was to stay close to her.

After both of our injuries sustained fighting Silva, I stayed in Scotland with the old man while M convalesced in the highlands. She said that she would rather be there than in London and I agreed. I enjoyed my time there pushing her around the outdoor atrium of the hospital, once she was strong enough and we both were going a little stir crazy.

Only once did she ask me why I stayed beyond the time I required to heal. I let my eyes try to convey what my voice was unable too.

M merely looked down at her hands on her lap, while she sat in the wheelchair. I stared at her with all the longing I felt in my heart. I could have sworn that there was a slight tinge of red in her cheeks after enduring that particularly charged gaze.

Yes of course I was bored...there were only so many card games you could play in a day. The telly never held much interest for M but for the news and that, she said, never told the story behind the story.

I relished in the joy that I was with her and that she lived. That was all that mattered. M never acknowledged the buried lust I tried to convey subtly, through every touch to her skin or gently caress. Anything to have her body up against mine, even if it was only for a fleeting moment.

Was it wrong? The world might find it odd that a woman in her sixties could drive me wild with just the raise of her brow, but those idiots only see the superficial. If they new M...what she did and how she managed herself and her people, they too would fall for her in an instant. M frustrated the hell out of me at times and I'm surely not the only one she's bitched out over the years. However, she had also protected me and all her agents from the same idiots who likely found her a stubborn nuisance.

I was long healed but stayed by her side during her physiotherapy. To encourage her and speed her full recovery and eventual return to work. I really thought that she knew the answer to her question. " _Why do you stay babysitting me when you could be back out there, 007?"_

Why I was still with her? " _I may still be your best agent M but there are many younger agents they deserve a chance now. Besides, Mallory didn't want to pay for your guard."_ She had laughed at my remark but still looked at me like she was expecting me to divulge more.

We bantered back and forth, which was completely normal for the two of us. Eventually they let us go back to London. Back to our normal lives...apart. M strived to pretend that none of it happened and got back to normal procedures.

What was not normal professional procedure between us, was the fact that I broke into her flat every time I returned from a mission depending on the time. But I didn't last night...something I regret not doing now. I never returned to London until 02:00 this morning and arriving at her flat at that time would have been like signing my own death warrant.

I didn't want to be away from her for extended periods. Three weeks was my absolute limit to go without seeing her. I want to tell her...to say those three words that scare me more than all the bombs and guns in the world. Strange that with all the women I've known, that I'm scared of what M's reaction would be.

I couldn't think of a way to seduce her for the life of me. M's an enigma wrapped in an attractive power suit and able to stare down men twice her size. She's heard me seduce countless women a number of times on missions and I fear that she might consider anything I said, just a line. A standard pick up I used for those women that meant little to me, beyond the information they could give me for M.

Other than Vesper...I don't do relationships, nor sleep around for amusement or a challenge of any kind. I'm not a lady's man but women are attracted to me. I've often wondered if M had ever been...tempted. She's never slipped and given me any indication but for those moments when the life was easing out of her in my family's Kirk.

I had been working on a way to broach the subject of our strange relationship over the past couple of months. I brought her back a gifts...like a peace offerings. Usually, a bottle from duty free to replace all that I helped myself to in her flat.

On one such illustrious return, I was drugged from a cracked rib and I arrived after 23:00. I remember the way her eyes flashed as she stood in her dressing gown, arms crossed letting me have it about injuries and the mission. Damn it if I hadn't desperately wanted to kiss her. The medication made me mumble something of the sort...about how a good kiss would stop her tirade. The shocked look on her face was priceless. She never mentioned it again and I hadn't either. Drugs and alcohol are the ultimate excuse, that and near death experiences so it seemed.

What a relationship the two of us endure. I have a feeling that she knew deep down how I'd felt about her in Glencoe hospital. But to her mind it would be just too outrageous to believe. She never mentioned swooning into my arms and what she said to me after Silva.

M had always been frustratingly stubborn. I believed that M knew I loved her but she wouldn't allow herself to believe what's been right in front of her beautiful face for well over six months now.

I've done everything a man could manage but actually ask her out on a date. I've asked her to the cafe on more than one occasion but she'd always asked for me to bring her back a cup of tea, claiming she was far too busy to be traipsing around on the street to stand in line for; overpriced, burnt tasting, caffeinated water.

The crux of it was, that I'd been flirting with M since the day I met her and I've never stopped. I looked after her in Scotland...Christ...I came back just because her office had been destroyed! The fear I experienced when I thought she might have been killed was much like I was feeling right now.

Finally reaching my destination was a relief from this brooding reflection and my conflicting emotions. Enough of that! I need action, I need her back and damn it, I need her in my arms!

I stormed into the office past Eve Moneypenny and threw open M's office door.

Tanner, Q and Gareth Mallory stood around M's desk looking at report as I barged in and interrupted them.

"Why the hell didn't you call me in?"

"I'm sorry 007 but we've been a tad busy, what with the attack on M. We can go over your mission later." Tanner said snappily.

"Don't be an idiot Tanner you know exactly what I'm talking about! Is she hurt!?"

"She was alive when they took her 007 and this is a matter of national security, outside MI6's purview." Mallory stated as he looked at me with a questioning gaze.

"Bullshit! What do we know? Where is she?" I said directly to Q, knowing that at least he would have some useful intelligence to divulge without much prodding.

"M would have been walking this hallway. I have hacked the CCTV from within Whitehall but they managed to cut the feed from the street outside somehow…"

"Some of Silva's left overs? Anyone else targeted or hurt?" I asked, knowing the expertise that would have been necessary to accomplish this.

"No one hurt and no; all of Silva's are accounted for but they might know the same people because there are similarities." Q stated.

"This is unheard of! Who would target and kidnap the head of MI6? No one is suppose to know who she bloody well is!" Tanner said in frustration. Tanner's guilt for not being with M was obviously getting to him.

"What was she meeting about?" I asked calmly considering the pressure of these circumstances. I needed to focus my dread on something constructive.

"There was a preliminary discussion between M, the head of MI5, C and of course the PM." Tanner added.

"About what?"

"That is need to know only." Mallory added looking serious.

"You know don't you?" I shoot back at him just as serious. It had the desired effect and the man looked down and away from me.

"I've got something!" Q yelled as he looked at his tablet. He pointed to the larger screen that came to life, just as Thomas entered the room with Moneypenny. I nod to them both as Mallory frowned.

"Mr. Mallory...we all care about her and we want to help." Eve added crossing her arms and leaning against M's desk as Q worked out the connection and began to play M walking from the office of the security minister in the corridors of Whitehall.

Although, walking would be a tame description of the way M bounced purposefully from the room. The images from above giving a rather spectacular view of M's cleavage. Damn I loved the way she thumbed her nose at age appropriate clothing. Her business attire was professional, without being dowdy and very attractively tailored for her short curvy figure.

M was speaking animatedly to the younger man walking beside her. It was hard not to laugh at the man trying to keep up with her.

"M is not amused with...whoever...this new C is, that is certain." Q stated and Eve had to cover the laugh with a sudden cough.

"Yes." Mallory paused and then added. "That is Max Denbigh...C, from MI5."

C looked at M with a smirk and then suddenly they both stopped and looked towards the end of the hall. Max...C began to walk back the other way as M remained there, frozen to the spot until her driver approached and collected her, taking her out of the cctv feed.

Once outside the building on the street, M suddenly grabbed her arm as if stung, staring straight ahead. A masked man rushed to her and scooped her up in his arms. He ran with M down the street, turning into a blind alley and then they lost image.

"What's down that alley Mallory?" Thomas asked.

"There's a delivery lane and usually there would be security and video on that side of the building. Q look to the other outside feeds. The rest of the meeting with foreign delegates was to be at the Savoy and I was going to meet her there later for the luncheon."

"Do you have any other shots Q?" I asked trying to not sound as desperate as I felt inside.

"I've been trying. I have one from another angle but it only shows the emergency vehicles arriving.

"Do any of them leave?" Mallory and Bond ask at the same time.

Q paused and typed some more. Thomas look perplexed. "That was how Silva escaped the courtroom, months back." Mallory added.

"Yes! One of them left from that alley next to M's car." Q stated.

"The BBC is assuming it was an attack to try to get the PM." Tanner stated.

"It looks like they were targeting M as far as I'm concerned." Thomas said with a frown.

"Did C get out?" Mallory asked.

"Not that I can find." Q answered. "The ambulance that left went to towards the Savoy and turned around in their entrance. Paused only for a moment and blank air...then left back towards Parliament."

"I'm headed to the Savoy." I said to them as I pulled a comm from my pocket and placed it in my ear.

"You will never get close! There is already security there and likely on high alert after the attack near Whitehall." Mallory added quickly. "Just let MI5 handle this Bond!"

I shot him a look that summed up everything I'm feeling at the moment and Thomas said suddenly. "Come on Bond, I'll drive you."

Thankfully, not only I, had a loyalty to the woman who pulled the strings on our behalf to the rest of the intelligence community.

I turned slightly to Mallory as we left. "Obviously they've let something fall through the cracks, as M was the only one taken, it appears that she was the intended target."

"I don't disagree. And Bond...it looks like she was not the only sentimental one." Mallory said appraising me. He had said that to her after my failed test results came in before the disaster at Skyfall.

"Why would anyone attack the better defended place first?" Tanner asked confused, bringing us all back into focus. "I mean it still worked but they did grab her from the street not Whitehall itself but wouldn't the Savoy have been the easier target?"

"I think you and Mallory should find C and ask him that very question." I said as 005 and I leave on our rescue mission. Tanner had a point. Why didn't they wait until at the Savoy for the meeting, unless they didn't care, or didn't realize the hotel was the next stop for her and not back to MI6.

Immediately after we departed Q clicked in on my comm and Thomas nodded as he put his on also. Thomas wove in and out of traffic towards the Savoy. The police had many streets closed and that made it all frustratingly difficult.

Eventually I slammed my hands on the dash. "Let me out here! I'll run."

Q was in my ear with Moneypenny and Tanner's excited voices saying that M was found being dragged into a hotel suite on the 5th floor of the Savoy. They managed to gather video feed to prove it."

"I'll park the car and follow." Thomas said as I hit the ground running.

"Why on earth would they take her to the hotel where she was headed for a meeting? This doesn't make any sense?" Tanner said in my earpiece.

"Q should look into reasons Tanner." I panted as I jogged down the street. "I don't really care about the why. I just care about getting her back alive."

To be continued...


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

The pounding of my feet on the cobbled street echoed the frantic beating of my heart. There were only a few reasons why someone would want to drag the head of MI6 to a posh secluded hotel room and none of them were good.

Even if it was the Savoy, I know M would have beyond strong issues with this happening. For one; she will be furious that terrorists were able to slip so close to her that they managed to accomplish such a task. Secondly; like me she would assume this had something to do with Silva and his organization. Thirdly; she will tear Whitehall security and MI5 down a peg for allowing this to happen on home soil.

Thank god our team figured out where they took her or they would be able to sneak her out of the country. Domestic security certainly wouldn't be looking right under their collective noses and think that she was in the very hotel they were to meet with her.

It was in these moments that my feelings for M bubbled to the surface again...like Skyfall. I'm weak because of these longings that I have for her...feelings that I should not have!

I had done nothing to openly state to her how I felt...and she would find it odd, or perhaps weak. I don't bloody well know!

How do you tell a woman like her, that you fancy her? As more than just a boss?

She would laugh it off...call me absurd and send me away. I would hate that. Or I could push for more, in an attempt to seduce her, like any other mark. No; that was far too base for her...it would never do.

M was special. I needed her more, far more than I ever thought I would need a woman in my life. All of this would be an embarrassment to her.

_A woman of her years and an agent!_

She would be throwing her career away over it. Not to mention what they would say about me...bucking for another promotions...mummy issues abound. What others would say echo through my thoughts as I ran harder and faster toward the hotel.

My heart pounding, blood pumping and heat spreading through me with the urgency of this rescue mission.

_How long had they been...whatever...lovers...for lack of a better word?_

_She's so much older than him. What is she thinking? How often did it happen?_

_Who initiated or did she order him too?_

_No wonder he had all the choice assignments._

_M is too good for him._

_I wonder if he was screwing her when her husband was alive?_

_Do you think they did it in her office?_

_Was he after her money?_

_Was it a one time thing or did she use her agents like toy boys to satisfy her needs?_

_Was this what she made all her 00 agents do?_

_He's certainly not bragging about bedding the boss!_

Of course my brain diverts to the rude and crude root of what gossips will condemn the both of us with. The imaginary details of their sorted tryst...ones that hadn't bloody well happened! All because of my fear of this very thing!

My fear of anything real, or anything solid after Vesper's betrayal. Vesper was a fleeting affair and M has been the longest relationship I've ever had with a woman, including my mother.

Vesper did her best to ruin me and almost let her, even with M trying her damnedest to lift me up again. There...right there was why I loved her. The root of every sexual desire I have felt in the middle of the night, my arm wrapped around a nameless woman I picked up in a bar. Sated in body but never in mind.

No...their firm bodies and willing smiles did nothing for my soul.

M's glare and the arch of one of her elegant eyebrows in rebuke, did more to get my blood pumping. More than a thousand cardboard cut out fashion models under me for a night could accomplish. M often left me more breathless than my current desperate sprint and that was just my imagination. That and our debriefs left me panting and on edge with desire.

It was amazing what went through my mind in a rush to run into danger to find her...save her. I still have time to plan what I would do after finding and killing everyone that took her. No matter the reason, they would meet the same fate as Silva.

Silva, the maniac would be lover from her days as section head of Hong Kong. In the time since Skyfall I had come to realize that Silva was right about some things. He was right to feel angry and betrayed, but he was wrong to have done what he did in the first place. He did it to impress the practically unimpressible M and that I could relate too.

It did not take long to reach the conclusion that in his confused brain he loved her like no other. He was driven to impress her and then after years of painful torture he was driven to chase her down and try to kill her.

M told me later in Belford hospital, about his inability to pull the trigger. That he had wanted both of them to die together. The insane raving fantasy, of two lovers turned enemies and then killed with the same bullet.

Silva had not planned on living without her. In his sick and demented way he loved her and when he had her in his arms...all his plans within plans failed him. I did my best to waylay him. I managed to destroy his helicopter and even though he thought me taken care of by his last man, MI6 would end him. He knew there would be no escape for him.

I rounded a corner dodging in and out of pedestrians and running alongside cars in my mad dash to get to the Savoy. There were people everywhere chattering about what was going on.

Enough dwelling on that madman.

As I got closer to the hotel the security increased. I was still wearing my work badge on my jacket identifying me as MI6 for those who cared or dared stop me.

In my fantasy, my seduction of M would be more romantic...mean more and feel better than anything had ever felt before. A relief from deep within me, like quenching an insatiable thirst with the finest spring water. The image of her under me...had woken me up on more than one night, sweating, heart pounding and desire cemented in my memory of a lust filled dream.

I don't always remember my dreams; for which I am often thankful but those featuring my heart's desire and my mind's turmoil, always leave me desperate to see her. I've had relations with older women before and enjoyed it immensely but I've never fallen in love with them until now.

I don't want her as a mother...my mother was far nicer to me than M's ever been. I wondered about the obvious comparison that people will make. An older woman and younger man was still unacceptable as a world view.

I narrowly missed toppling over a child's pram. I met the angered eyes of it's parents as I twisted out of the way and continued running. I turned the next corner panting as I hit the entrance of the hotel.

Security was milling about and I pulled the badge out as they just nodded. Bellboys tried to stop me, not knowing that I was basically part of the security. The place was full of people and few of the security whistled at me in my rush but I don't stop and they didn't follow. Q must have warned them that I was coming. I hit the stairs with them following as I speak to Q through comms.

"Keep security off my back, away from the 5th floor and evacuate this hotel!" Why did the kidnapper bring her to a luxury hotel, to hide in plane sight? And why take her from Whitehall, when she was do to come here anyway?

"And Q...what is it about this hotel...that makes the kidnappers feel secure?"

"On it Bond. Fire alarm should be sounding….now!" As if on cue the alarms started going as I climbed the stair two at a time, smashing suddenly into the hall of the fifth floor.

"I'm on the 5th floor. What room Q!?"

"523, suite overlooking the river. Perhaps that's why Bond...the river?"

"Perhaps...get boats in the water as back up. The least we can say is that they have taste." I said to relieve some of the tension.

I straighten my tie and pull my jacket arms down, rotating my shoulders forward and unkinking my neck as I checked my cuff links. I walk calmly towards the room they have M in, past people leaving their rooms to get to the stairs because of the alarm. There are only about a dozen on this floor at the moment and I catch my breath as I move towards my goal.

"Thomas hold back until I know what I'm dealing with." I said though comms and stood outside the door. I checked my gun and then kicked the door.

"I'm still managing the car trying to get closer. I will be there soon." 005 responded as I kicked a second time and the hotel door crashed inwards.

I instantly assessed the room; three guards, I shot two before suprise could settle and they could react. I turned to shot at the third but he charged me at the last moment.

I drilled my fist into his face as we went back and forth across the suite, wrestling for dominance as we knocked furniture over. My gun was knocked from my hand as we fell to the floor. He got on top of me, as I heard a voice laugh from the now open bedroom door.

All I can think of is that I still have not seen M.

"James...James...I was wondering when you would arrive." The man said in a familiar and accented voice.

I bucked and grasped my attacker around the neck with my ankles and yanked him off me, leaping to my feet, I kicked him...hard. I turned to face the amused voice, as I sensed more entering the suite from the hall.

" _Bond we heard that and you have several moving towards the suite! They've closed off the lobby and have other very important hostages."_ Q said in a panicked voice until Tanner took over the comms.

" _MI5 is setting up a perimeter with the police and Mallory has been coordinating snipers on nearby rooftops. I have our agents in the river incase they are needed. There are armed targets on the helicopter pad on the roof. Unless 005 can find away in you are on your own!"_

I don't answer as I was busy assessing what to do next. I need to find M, before I deal with the stand off outside and inside this hotel.

Two came out from somewhere behind me grabbing my arms. Another man came from the bedroom, around the small man standing and chuckling at me in the threshold. It stung as he plunged the needle harshly into my neck.

I fell to my knees, as the strong hands of two others pushed me down to the carpet.

"Where is M?!" I managed as the drug began to take hold.

Things were fuzzy, as the familiar man walked towards me. He grabbed the comm from my ear with a sneer on his face. He stomped on the device and crushed it under his heel.

I know him! My heart still raced from the run, fight and now the image before me. "Franz? But you're dead!" I slurred, trying to stay alert. Stupid drugs...not fair...can't clear my mind. Where is M? Why is Franz not dead?

"No...not Franz...Franz Oberhauser did die, my dear foster brother. Ernst Stavro Blofeld is my phoenix name and your pain is my game!"

The confusion must have shown on my face as he got closer and grasped my chin in his hands roughly.

"We will discuss this later, perhaps when you wake. As for your beloved M...well...she is in the bedroom...waiting."

I fight the drug harder than I've ever tried before. It was not pulling me completely under. Franz must want me to see something before he kills me. I suppose I should be thankful for that at least. This does not help the dread that welled up from my guts...don't let him...she can't be...dead...M!

My mind was muddled and all I could think about was M. If he touched her…my mind reeled with the possibilities...the abhorrence of the images in my head, of M lying dead in the next room overwhelmed me.

I clenched my fists and strained against the men holding me down. I will try my best to kill him, even if he was my long lost foster brother.

To be continued...


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For Justanotherunderstudy because you were so excited about the last chapter.  
> Here is an early submission for continuation. I hope you enjoy! :)

**Chapter 3**

"You sick...manipulative...bastard! What...did you...do?!" I managed to slur out.

One of his men that I wrestled and kicked earlier, plus one that must have been in the bedroom of the suite, lifted me under the arms and dragged me in front of Franz Oberhauser. I could hear others milling about somewhere speaking in English and German over radios. Damn him! Franz had a small mercinary army with him.

My former foster brother. My mind casts back to childhood, which I tried to avoid without much success on the best of days. Only with copious amounts of alcohol was I able to dull my minds insistence on dwelling on my past. It was not a good time in my life but my father's old friend offered to take me for a summer after I had given poor aunt Charmian the task of dealing with my expulsion from school.

Hannes was a good man and helped me learn how to survive in the wilderness. All things I would need for the military and then MI6 training in my years to come. My mind wandered as I remembered the man for how he made me feel wanted...even if Franz didn't.

"Where have I been? You ask, oh so eloquently. Well, you could say that I've been around and surrounding everything that you do actually. Dear b...r...o...t...h...e...r." His voice drew out brother to an absurd length to accentuate some point no doubt. He was a slimy bastard and always was.

"What?"

Franz motioned to one of his other men standing behind me. The man gave him a walkie-talkie and he said into it. "Do stop that infernal alarm will you. Make sure no one enters or leaves unless they are dead of course. If you have to kill a hostage; so be it and toss the body outside for all the world to see."

Franz casually handed back the radio and knelt down in front of me. "I've been here since the beginning of your illustrious career…brother...Commander James Andrew Bond of the Royal Navy. Or should I give you a number? 007, perhaps?" Franz purred out much of this out as if relishing finally getting the chance to say it to me. Up Close and personal.

"Hannes?" I was still fighting to concentrate, as the drugs tried to pull me down, I couldn't manage much more than one word questions by this point. I was alternating between overheated and cold and clammy as I fought whatever they had given me.

"Oh...daddy dearest had to die. He made me call you...brother and we did not share the same blood. He wanted to adopt you! I made him send you back to your poor stressed spinster of an aunt. Father had ignored me! So I made a plan. Yes, I killed him and myself so to speak and all in order to rise again as it was meant to be!" Franz was enjoying this far too much as he looked directly into my eyes.

"For me to become Ernst Stavro Blofeld. A better line...my mother's lineage...much more to my liking. German aristocracy some time ago but you know how it is...through a female line. The patriarchy likes to ignore them. Until there are none left, that is."

Franz laughed at his own observation, he stood back up and began pacing the floor. "Thank god that infernal alarm has stopped. That must have been you dear James, trying to save the innocents in the hotel. After all, I am the head of a dangerous secret organization...wait...you haven't even guessed our name yet." He didn't seem quite right and the fog of whatever drug he used on me, made him seem even more strange.

"You...always were...a weird little man." I didn't see the hand coming but I damn well felt it!

It connected with my head with a dull thud, as I fell forward onto the rug. His men grabbed me and pulled me back up to my knees as a red faced Franz rubbed his hand in discomfort. I hoped it hurt the slimy bastard.

"I was always...told...I was hard headed...the Scot in me...no doubt."

Franz snarled. "Oh yes...the degenerate side of you...come! I have someone you rushed in here unprepared to save." He turned away and moved to open the bedroom doors. His goons pulled me along to the now open French doors to the bedroom.

I'm still on my knees but I can see the top of her white head...as for the rest...I manage to take in the machines attached to her and her arms spread eagle. M looks like she was being crucified against the headboard.

M's head hung down, her back pinned to the headboard and her arms outstretched and shackled. There was a doctor checking on her. Her shoes are neatly at the foot of the bed and her grey jacket and mauve silk scarf hung on the back of a chair.

From my angle on the floor I could see M's black blouse was open displayed all of her upper chest and teased the dark purple lace of her bra. Her grey skirt had ridden up slightly to show the tops of her stockings and garter. Not exactly the moment I had hoped to discover M's preference in lingerie and hosiery but it currently could not be helped.

There were sensor tabs over her heart and on her neck and temples as the machine pumped some sort of drug into the IV in her arm. The drugs they shot into me had begun to wear off, possibly by sheer force of will or the shock of seeing her like this.

I would not let him know that I was clearer headed, if I could manage through the abject shock and horror coursing through my body. There were still two men beside me to prevent me from strangling my bastard of a foster brother.

There was another machine that resembled something from a dentist office. "Why?" I asked.

"I told you why James. I want to be the orchestrator of all your pain."

I tear my gaze from M and looked at Franz standing beside her as he nodded to the doctor. The doctor does something to M's IV.

"Stop! Don't!" I yelled in shocked desperation. Not this way! Don't let her die like this!

"James...James don't fret so. He is just waking sleeping beauty up." Franz said with a sadistic smile. He looked like he was about to go on a sailboat not kidnap and drug the head of MI6. He was wearing a navy jacket with a red ascot and white polo. His khaki trousers rolled at the bottom and a pair of penny loafers without socks, added to the look.

M began to stir. She managed to lift her head as she looked around the room with a frown. Then her eyes meet mine and froze.

"I am just waking her up to tell you both what is going on. I would rather tell you together, as I do hate repeating myself. You know James; I really never thought that I would have the opportunity to meet this lovely lady. I would have thought that setting Silva on her like a rabid dog, would have been her demise." Franz was standing by the right side of the bed and turned his focus back to M. "You shocked me by pulling through that my dear M."

He turned back towards me. "Although James; you lost that ugly pile of stones that your father once called home. Still; I was sad Silva had to die. He was entertainingly talented, to say the least and he was obsessed with this lovely lady." Franz said as he placed his hand on her nearly exposed thigh, giving it a pat.

"If he had succeeded...I would have had the added bonus of sending you on yet another spiral of grief...just like after...Vesper."

The shock must be as apparent on my face as it was on M's because he immediately began a rather joyous explanation. He tossed his hands in the air dramatically.

"Oh yes...you see...I am behind Le Chiffre, Quantum...everything." He looked between the two of us as continued his dramatic recital.

"I knew dangling a woman like Vesper would be just the thing. Who do you think mentioned her name to a certain minister of the treasury? After all...she was just an accountant." Franz smirked as he turned back and forth between us.

Franz leaned over to look more closely at M. He moved down the bed and placed his hand on her foot and began to trail it up her leg lightly, to illicit a response. I supplied one by growling as M's eyes just widened in surprise. Once her shock had passed she glared daggers at him.

"I have to say M...you are far more pleasing to the eye than I ever thought. There is something about you...your eyes...they are compelling! You've wonderful structure…cheek bones...extraordinaire!" Franz continued as his fingers moved up her body and neck to linger on her collarbone and finally trace her face.

M sat frozen. "What is this all about?" M demanded groggily, yet still with an air of command.

"This my dear, is about your agent and your...meddling...costing me a great deal of money."

"Money?! Not very creative...for what I can only guess, is an act of a supposed self idolized super-villain. One who claims...to have sent many to their demise, just for revenge on one agent. Your status is not as vast as you might want...the underworld where you dwell to know." M added haughtily.

That was one of the reasons I loved her so much. Her ability, even in weakness to have untapped resources and strength of purpose.

M got to the core of Franz's psyche, distracted and drugged. I could see the anger bubble up in him immediately. M would never give in nor surrender. She would rather die and I would really rather she didn't.

That was the purpose of men like me. To take the physical hit to protect her and this country from threats like Franz.

Franz looked down at me kneeling at the foot of the bed. "I see what you see in her. She is far more than her age this one. I thought she must have been, in order to drive Silva over the edge like she did. All because she denied him a little taste."

He turned back towards M to see her reaction. It was always about reactions with him.

M's eyes widened in shock as she turned away from him and met mine while I looked over Franz's shoulder. This had just taken another sharp turn and one that M had not anticipated. I had envisioned this; in the dread of coming after her in a luxury hotel suite, my mind had wandered to her being sexually assaulted.

"Come now my dear...you knew he fancied you and you dropped him...like...a...hot...gun. Left the poor genius to the Chinese to deal with, all because you didn't want to get blood on your Lilly white hands. All the while you were brokering an exchange with the Chinese that saved face and made you M. Oh...yes...I know your true name Olivia. Olivia...Mansfield...do you know how I found out?"

"No I don't particularly care but I suspect that you will enjoy telling me in excruciating detail." M stated blandly as she rolled her eyes demonstratively.

Franz smiled and moved along the side of the bed so that both of us could see him better.

"Well the story goes like this: Years ago after Tiago escaped he needed financing and I found him. Over brotherly drinks and dinner he told me of the gorgeous section head of Hong Kong. Well he told me your name and said that you must have died, because he could not locate you, nor your husband...who I assumed was the reason you would not entertain the large handsome Silva in your bed."

Franz paused to let that sink in and then climbed up to sit with M on the bed facing me on the floor beside his men. "There...that's more comfortable. How are you feeling darling?" Franz patted her thigh again and I tensed, frustratingly unable to remove those offensive digits from her leg.

"My arms hurt. Who do you work for?"

Franz nodded and the doctor came and unclasped M's right arm and then moved around the bed to do the same for her left, removing the IV and placing plaster on it.

Franz nodded and the man retreated into the suite. "No one...they all work for me...see." Franz showed her a silver or platinum ring he wore. "You recognize it?"

M nodded after examining the ring while trying to rub some circulation back into her numb arms. "What is this octopus organization called? The image is known to me but the name...I have not heard."

"We are Spectre my dear...Quantum was just a small portion, one tentacle of my organization."

"And I am to believe that you...are the head of this organization and you came to London to do this? Poor planning if you ask me." M said, shrugging at his plan and considering it far from an efficient use of an evil organization knowing her.

"Harumph...well aren't you a difficult lady to please. My evil genius is not enough for you? Just relax and listen to the rest of the tale." M had tried to move off the bed but Franz pulled her back down right up against him. M turned to look out the window rather than at Franz cozying up beside her to make her uncomfortable. I could see it by the ridged way that she sat in his unwanted grasp.

The windows of the room overlooked the Thames and a helicopter swooped by making a loud noise as it buzzed the hotel. Franz waved at it as, M continued to rub feeling back into her wrists and arms.

"Back to my story. Well I never forget a name...names are important to remember. The years moved by and Silva had done some excellent work for me. I met him at a production of the Medea in Alexandria...we pondered the play and our similar roles in that play...one of revenge... if you are not aware." Franz said looking at me as he patted M's thigh...again.

The look I gave him back must have amused him as he began to laugh. "Just as I suspected. I had wondered if you were a copy of Silva...or maybe it has gone farther and you and she…"

M looks shocked suddenly as she turned to look directly at him as they both sat up against the headboard. "What are you insinuating? That I take my staff to bed?"

"It had occurred to me madam...you inspire much loyalty. I wondered if perhaps you had magical properties...perhaps if I...sampled some of them?" Franz grasped M's knee hard and I jumped to my feet.

"Get your hands off her Franz!" Blurted out of my mouth as his men grabbed me and twisted my arms behind my back. They pushed me back to my knees as M tried to remove his hand from her knee.

Franz instead placed his hand around her neck and pulled M across him, into a feral kiss. He met my eyes as he forced M to endure his mouth on hers.

I want to hit someone...hard!

I'll peel the skin from my former brother's body for daring to touch M like that!

To be continued...


	4. Chapter 4

 

"I said stop touching her!" I struggled against the men holding me.

"I'm far from finished with either of you." Franz said with his hand back on M's upper thigh.

"What is it that you did with Quantum and Silva...what were you working on and why have Bond as a target?" M questioned quickly, ignoring his attempt to make her uncomfortable with his clumsy sexual overtures.

"Ah...there...now the real head of MI6 emerges under extreme...pressure even." Franz said moving his hand from her leg and back to caress her face.

"Well my dear...after being so rudely interrupted by James I will tell you the rest of the story. I didn't know that you were Olivia Mansfield but I did have images of you as M. I never put it together until I saw a news article with your husband's name, in the obituary and then did some digging. There you were...at the funeral...the name Mansfield and it clicked into place."

Franz paused as another man arrived and came to him whispering in his ear. "I know...there is no emergency yet...and they know I have her...they will not risk the head of MI6 yet. Have my helicopter return land on the roof in an hour. I want to bring M...she is entrancing don't you think?"

Franz paused and looked past his lacky and over to me still on my knees at the foot of the bed. M sat there enduring his arm around her and I could do nothing to help her. What a useless feeling! My mind was still recovering from the drugs and the stress of seeing her like this. I'm trying desperately to work out a way to kill him and save her from this situation.

"I really hadn't a clue until I finally met her but now I understand...and I don't want this fruitful meeting to end...for us anyway." Franz said looking directly at me.

He planned to kill me and take M, I wonder where 005 got to? And what Q and Tanner have decided was the best course of action, should I get shot or killed.

That helicopter was either Franz's, or reconnaissance and Thomas should be nearby by now if he made his way into the hotel. M was the primary goal. If I died, as long as M lived and not in the hands of Franz, I would go to my death willingly.

"I had really thought that this would be simpler...I meant to get M, you would come running to save the lovely damsel you've been pining for for years and then kill M in front of you. My task would be complete. Your spiral of pain would be complete. To kill yet another woman you loved and watch you crumble like what happened on that roof top in Venice after Vesper drowned. But now that I've gotten to know M a little...I've changed my mind. Lovely isn't it James? You came rushing in here without a plan to save her and you did! I will not kill her but I will take her."

"I will kill you!" I know it sounded week but I had, had enough of his taunting.

"Tut tut James. Let me finish the story for M...I can tell she is curious about why Silva took so long to come for her, since he had such a lusty desire to kill her." Franz added as he waved his finger in my direction.

"You see I met with the man in Alexandria and enjoyed a classical Greek play. I gave him images of you at the funeral for the former Professor Nigel Mansfield. You see; the name tripped my memory and I knew that Olivia Mansfield was head of station H. Silva had described you as a small blonde woman with curves...and eyes like a cat. I told Silva that you never died but moved up and therefore, MI6 buried everything about the seductive Olivia Mansfield when you became M. Silva was like a man reborn...a man with a plan!" Franz said in delight.

"Once he knew...the events moved quickly. He let loose delightful chaos on MI6 all the while humiliating and hounding his lost love."

M's mouth hung open in shock. "Forget the flirtations with me Oberhauser...I bloody well know well enough to expect it all a ruse. Silva was insane enough to believe that I would naturally fall for his act in the 90's and you are just as unstable as he was it seems. You did all this...for revenge? You have no true interest in keeping me and I can assure you I will not mellow with age. You tried to have my bodyguard kill me!"

"Tut...tut my love and you may grow to be charmed by me in time." Franz patted her thigh again.

"I personally did not try to kill you that was all Mr. White for which I had a difficult time preventing your jilted lover Silva from tearing his heart out for the slight. White, I might add is currently hiding from me more than he is you, at this point." Franz put his arm around M's shoulder grasping and squeezing her in a familiarity that she and I obviously objected to.

I could see M try to pull away from him but he refused to release her.

"He grossly overestimated the reign of freedom I allowed him with that attempt. Silva was incensed and I needed him focused on coding, not revenge on the coworker who almost had you shot! Now I am very pleased that he failed and Silva too for that matter." Franz leered at M's cleavage and I found myself pulling against my handlers again. They pinned me and pulled my arms behind my back.

"You are responsible for having had all those people killed? Vesper, Strawberry fields, Solange...my imbedded agents! All for your petty revenge? Just because daddy didn't like you as much as Bond!" M was growing in anger as she again began to try to pull away and climb off the opposite side of the bed.

"Now, now...come stay here by me. I still have some experiments I need to do. This machine has tiny little drills to remove unwanted memories. I was planning on using it on you M in front of my dear foster brother, but I like your mind and you intrigue me. Not to mention, what you know could make me an even more powerful and rich man. Since I have now decided to dramatically step out of the shadows."

"I will do no such thing! Do you actually think I have not prepared for such events! Did you actually think you could take me...in my city...and not pay the consequences! You're delusional!"

M managed to get free of Franz herself and off the bed, her back was to the window as she stared daggers at Franz.

"Come now my dear. I have removed your poison tooth capsule...Silva mentioned the old cyanide capsule that were common back then. I assumed you had one put in just in case you were taken alive. You seem a logical woman who would never wish to endure torture or give up any of Her Majesty's secrets. Franz climbed across the bed after her and I tensed, making ready to try to take out the guards.

"Take me!" I yelled. Franz paused and turned to me. "If you have to hurt someone...hurt me...it's what you really want."

Franz smiled as he climbed off the bed in front of M. If only some sharp shooter had eyes on him through the window.

He nodded towards me and his men as they dragged me to the bed. The doctor entered the room as M removed the sensors tabs from her body and threw them on the bed. Franz held her around the shoulders beside him as he walked her to the end of the bed. One of the men from the other room entered with a wingback chair and Franz pushed M into it at the foot of the bed on the same spot I had been kneeling staring at M.

"I will allow you to look at your beloved M as I drill away all your memories of loving her...and all those now faceless women you've taken to bed, ironically on her orders. Think of it this way James...no more pain...no more agony of losing Vesper, your parents and now M."

My eyes shot to M at the end of the bed as the doctor shackled me against the headboard, like M was when I first saw her.

"Oh yes...you are loosing her and that may be more painful that all the others combined. I am taking your beloved M with me and she will never return to England. She may die in my care...old age I hope. I do plan on making her my most well informed confidant and most definitely my lover for a time. As it suits me."

"Fuck off Franz!" I yelled as a doctor placed clamps around my head. I am forced to look directly into M's eyes as she sat at the end of the bed. The look that passes between us was full of fear and worry. There was no getting away from it. MI6 has not managed to assess the situation fast enough and I will be gone before they manage to free M. I hope to hell they free her.

"Why are you doing this? What's the point? You will not get away...away from Britain or from me should you escape." M said in pleading seriousness.

"Oh but the hostages downstairs will take care of that not to mention some other distractions."

Franz looked at one of his men and gave a signal. He left the room and within two minutes an explosion plumbed up from the river. We could see it from the window as a ship or boat exploded.

"What have you done? No matter these distraction you will not get out from under this Franz Oberhauser!" M shouted at him.

Franz knelt beside M's chair and grasped her face in his hands roughly. "Blofeld! Say it with me….Ernst Stavro Blofeld! You know if we are to become intimately acquainted you really should yell out the correct name upon completion."

M shook her head out of his grasp. "There will be no completion...between us! It will not happen at all Ernst! This is a suicide mission for you...BLOFELD...because my government will not have me held long...they would rather see me dead than in the hands of a terrorist!"

"Come now...give your long tenure as M a chance to inspire government loyalty to your department...oh yes...I know of the cuts you are dealing with."

"Oh; so I'm to take it that you are somehow behind this asinine attempt to dismantle my 00 programme?" M was getting really angry and although I'm focused on her, I'm also worried about the machine that was about to be used on me.

Franz smiled at her. "Getting rid of MI6 for MI5 and drones, computer watch programmes. All of these things I had a hand in...even your former lover Silva designed the programme for us...and at the head, a fresh faced youngster of my own choosing."

"C? My god...you put him up to this! That is how they got so close to Whitehall!"

"And how your lover Silva was able to get into that committee meeting."

"Stop calling him my lover! He was no such thing and you know it! If you are as smart as you claim you know very well that if I had actually carried on with the man, he would hardly have held on to those feelings for me for so long. No...he was a bitter, mad man wanting nothing more than revenge on me for doing my bloody job!"

Franz looked from M to me. "That...that is what I was hoping to witness! Such passion of purpose! You and I darling will be unstoppable. Perhaps we will even keep dear James around as he may need looking after, once these drills do their worst."

Franz walked over to me as one of his men followed and stood by the doctor to help hold my body still. Franz rolled a small stool over to a computer to control the drills, as I prepared myself for the end.

I wanted to say something to M who was looking at me with dread, when something caught my eye out the window. From my angle I can see a small aerial drone making it's way up the side of the hotel. It could just be surveying the explosion from below but to my mind this was all Q.

"M...I want you to fight him...don't let him…" I can't bring myself to say it.

"Bond save your strength." M said as she tried to stand and come to me. The other guard clamped a hand on her shoulder as a pounding came from the door in the suite.

"Ah...I see the troops have arrived." Bond could hear talking between the extra men Franz had in the suite and M's guard turned to see out large French doors between the bedroom and the suite.

"Time to remove some bad memories James. Say goodbye to M."

"M...be ready." I could see her tense as the small drill came to life and headed towards my temple. I want to tell her...to scream that I love her but my fear of the drill moving steadily closer, prevented me from making a sound.

"Stop! Franz...Blofeld whatever the hell you want me to call you! Don't do this and I will..."

My mouth hung open. Was M actually offering herself to stop him from killing me?

Before Franz could even ask a question the room was rocked in a sudden explosion. The blast sent material shooting into the room from the wall the bed rested against. The sound deafening everyone and clouding the room in dust and debris.

005, Stuart Thomas had arrived in typical 00 fashion. MI6 was making their own door to save M with the element of surprise.

To be continued...


	5. Chapter 5

 

The explosion killed the doctor instantly. Franz's computer controlling the drill blasted into him as he fell to the floor.

I instantly grab the man holding me with my legs and then managed to kicked him in the head. M disappeared to the floor, luckily she was alert enough to hit the deck. Gunfire sounded from the suite and from the hole in the wall from the neighbouring suite.

005 burst through the wall shooting the man struggling with me.

The main portion of Franz's team, not holding hostages in the lobby was in the suite. Thomas rushed to the door to take care of them.

He returned and immediately removed my arms from the restraints. I bounced off the bed and went to look through the now dust filled room for Franz.

He was on the ground holding his head as the roar of a fighter jet flies past. A sudden explosion over the river glowed brightening the sky as a helicopter is shot from it's approach to the hotel. The windows shake as the alarms begin to sound again.

My ears were ringing as I grabbed the gun that Thomas tossed to me and kicked my former foster brother in the leg to hear him groan. 005 helped M to her feet. I wanted to rush to her but I don't want to take my eyes off...Blofeld as he insisted on calling himself.

He would always be Franz to me and he was currently holding his face in pain. There was a deep gash running right down through his right eye. He bloody well deserved a bullet for what he had done.

"Bond...is he?" M rounded the bed and looked down at Franz as emergency services rushed in with Mallory, Tanner and a clean up team close behind.

"Go ahead James." Blofeld managed. "You know you want to end it. If you don't I will rise again like a phoenix. Pull that trigger James, murder me! I know you want too, so end me now!"

M came to my side and put her small hand on my right arm. She looked at me and I at her as she shook her head in a silent no. The firm press of her lips told me that she wanted him alive and not just for questioning.

M didn't want me be the one who killed him in revenge.

The killing I do for MI6 was impersonal, fast efficient and for a higher meaning. Putting Franz out of all our misery, this...this would be for me. For my revenge for what he had done to his father, me and for what he threatened to do to M.

Craig Mitchell paid for trying to kill her and M tore me a new one for doing that at the time. I will not make that mistake again. She doesn't want him dead, therefore I cannot kill him until she does. That was the black and white of our relationship. I was the weapon and her the strategic brain behind it.

M spoke to the men that flooded into the room and specifically Mallory and Tanner. "I want him watched closely. Mallory a word." M said as she pulled Mallory aside were I could no longer hear them speaking. I remained hovering over Franz and looking at the mess that was now his face.

The man looked grim and defiant. M turned back to them after her discussion with Gareth Mallory and then spoke again. "Tanner please go and help Mr. Mallory."

Tanner looked about to begin arguing. "I'm fine. Bond and Thomas will see me to base."

A paramedic came in to take Franz. I asked to see the man's identification and had Thomas contact Q on comms to authenticate before we let them take him. M shook the dust off her jacket and put on her shoes.

"I don't think this terrorist requires much pain medication yet. The doctors can take care of that later." I told the paramedics with serious inflection in my voice. The man nodded in understanding as they placed him on the gurney and lashed him in, none too gently.

"You two accompany him to hospital under guard and then to Belmarsh prison for acts of terror against the crown." M said as two junior agents came into view to assist. "Consider him armed and dangerous despite his injuries."

"M you need medical after being drugged by Franz." I said to her.

"So do you Bond...you were drugged also, were you not?"

I frowned...how did she? I mean she was still unconscious. My confusion must have been apparent because M smiled. "You were slurring your words when I first came too. Unless you went to a pub before charging in here alone to be captured rather than rescue me?"

"Damn it woman, can't anything be easy with you?" I said, shaking my head.

M laughed if for nothing more than the absurdity of the day we have had. Thomas just smirked as he looked between the two of us and lead the way out into the hall in front of M. "Tanner managed the team as I infiltrated the hotel ma'am. I found the explosives in the boot of the car and brought them along just in case."

"Thank you Thomas but I fear I will never hear the end of blowing up the Savoy of all places." M said. "As long as we get to pin it on Blofeld and terrorist the PM shouldn't be too upset. Was the meeting downstairs cleared?"

"Yes ma'am. No fatalities but for the terrorists." Thomas added.

"Thank god for that! What of the security for the event?"

"I was going to mention in my report M that they were gone."

"I see. Mallory is taking the lead on that investigation with Tanner."

"What are you thinking M...C?" I asked. M's lips were pressed in a thin line that indicated anger as she nodded.

M marched out of the suite with me following into the chaotic hallway as fire services and police stood around waiting for their time to inspect the rooms. As we exited the lift we could see medical swarming the place as well as MI5 agents. There were dead men scattered throughout the lobby and bullet holes through all the glass.

My guess would be that they were hit by snipers and then rushed before they could do any harm to the civilians and government members in the lobby lounge. We wove through the side streets to 005's car parked illegally double parked. An irate man stood beside the car whilst on his mobile pacing back and forth.

When we approached all dusty marching purposefully towards the car he looked about to say something until he saw the gun in my hand and 005's as we scanned the area for more of Blofeld's men. The man moved away from the car and up against the building as I held the back door open for M and Thomas climbed in the driver's seat. I followed M into the back as Tanner does when he accompanies her. I kept my gun out and ready.

* * *

It was a tense ride back to base and Thomas had to stop at several checkpoints as he drove us back.

After Silva destroyed M's office at Vauxhall, she had it reconstructed much like it was but for the colour of the rugs and the wall colour. The damage from the explosion shot outwards and mainly destroyed the windows and structural damage was minimal. There was talk of scrapping the building and moving us and MI5 into another location but M had been adamant that that would not happen.

M and I walked down to medical together alone after Thomas headed to his office to create his report.

"M...I want to say I'm sorry about not mounting the smoothest of rescues...and about what Franz said...I...well."

"Don't strain yourself 007 I know he was just trying to get a rise out of you. I am hardly your beloved and we have never been romantically inclined towards one and other. In fact; the thought...is absurd." M said flippantly.

"Wait a minute." I said as I grabbed M's hand effectively stopping her in the hall outside medical. "I may never get another chance to say this...but he was right."

"About what?" M asked confused.

"All of it." I looked at M waiting for what I said to sink in all the way. She pulled her hand out of mine, her mouth hanging open in shock. Her eyes were wide and looking a me as if I now had horns atop my head.

"Bond...I will not discuss this. Not here and not now!"

I held her gaze, trying to convey the truth in the dept of these feelings I have for her, through my eyes. She still looked suspicious and disbelieving, her frown turning to one of impatience and frustration. It was as if my confession ruined all her plans or that the truth was something that she had never seen coming and was ill equipped to handle after such a stressful day. I am hoping for the later and with some reflection she will understand. M thought carefully on things, not like an agent that has to fly by gut instinct in the field. M weighed all the options when she had the opportunity. When she didn't have the opportunity; like when I'm in the field, she trusted her agents gut response to the situation and supported us regardless of the outcome.

She began to move to the door. "Wait!" I said and she paused with her hand on the door but did not turn around. "You shouldn't be that suprised M. I've been breaking into your flat for years."

"I said not now Bond, I've enough to deal with, what with an attack on home soil aimed directly at me. And I don't need your drug addled fantasies to add to the muddle and confusion from today." M said bluntly, with her no need to continue with this; as a way of dismissing me completely.

"Ouch. That hurt." I said with a ghost of a smile as I moved my hand over my heart. I had to try to see the levity of the situation considering what she and I had been through today.

M pulled the door open and entered medical in a huff. I followed, getting angry at the stubborn woman but knowing there was nothing I could do that wouldn't make her even more incensed at my insolent behaviour.

The baring of my heart and soul, just to wait for her acknowledge it or to stomp all over it. Today she will ignore it. How I could possibly manage to get through to her later without pushing her? I knew this was where I had trouble with women but they usually cave. In all honesty, I've never had this problem with a woman before.

Damn stubborn...infuriatingly sexy...woman. Christ I have it bad!

Franz reinforced all of this by noticing the little things in my relationship with M, that we both had chosen to ignore for a long time. I've been living with this reality now since Skyfall and M had chosen to ignore it or didn't realize it existed.

I entered medical behind M, who was already being met by the doctor, as nurse Jackie came up and flirted with me. She guided me to a medical room beside the one M was in and performed the basic tests. I can just hear the doctor in the next one over talking with M in muted distorted tones.

_I think you know my opinion on this M and you must realize by now that it is time._

Jackie began speaking and I couldn't make out M's response to Dr. Rutherford's statement.

"So you were in the midst of all this uproar no doubt. I heard you and 005 saved her majesty from a lecherous man who took her to a hotel room against her will? I've got to say that would not be expected." Jackie laughed after her statement.

"You know I can't discuss what I do...and you should know better than to listen to gossip."

"Well he would have to be a dangerous psychopath to want to take the old battle axe as his monstrous bride." Jackie said with a chuckle.

She must have realized her mistake when she looked at my face because she pulled back suddenly. "I...I didn't mean it badly. I mean...she's a very attractive woman for her age...I mean...it's just her temperament...ice queen and all."

"Just do the tests...nurse and keep the gossip to yourself. This is a secretive organization and I will be having words with Tanner about these rumours."

"Oh James...please don't tell her...I didn't mean for it to sound that bad. I know she is always good to you 00 agents and a consummate professional…"

"Don't strain yourself on your backpedalling nurse." I said, as I stood to leave the room. I met the doctor coming out of M's.

"Bond...I was about to get to you."

"Never mind me. Is M alright?" As I asked as the door to her room opened and she stood there buttoning her blouse with a less than amused look on her face.

"That would be private between the doctor and myself 007." She stated coolly as she walked out of medical. I followed her. "You should have yourself checked out Bond."

"I was drugged with a mild sedative...I will be fine and Jackie took my readings and some blood."

"I see that you are still on a first name basis with the nursing staff." M said as she walked briskly toward the elevator.

"Yes well you send me there enough."

"I do, I suppose." M said with a sigh as she continued walking towards the lifts.

I followed her and entered the lift behind her. "007 you can take the rest of the day off considering the kind of day it's been."

I frowned at her. "I'm not leaving your side. I'm now your bodyguard ma'am; until we know who we can trust."

M looked shocked. "I am in office the rest of the day, calls to the PM to endure and likely a press statement to make. I have no need of a 00 bodyguard at this time."

"Well you've got one, so humour me. Not to mention Tanner will be in a state considering he could have done something if he hadn't been getting his teeth looked at this morning."

"He could have done nothing to prevent it...and if he had he would have likely gotten hurt or killed for any effort he did manage to put forth." M exited the lift and I followed to her office.

Moneypenny looked extremely relieved to see M. "Ma'am! Are you alright?"

"Yes...yes, I'm as good as I can be for my age apparently."

I nodded to moneypenny. "I will be her bodyguard for the time being." I can't help but wonder why M made that comment about her age. The doctor's words come back to me from the muted tones of the other cubicle.

My heart involuntarily clenched in my chest. Could there be something wrong with M? Did the events at Skyfall not heal as well as she had claimed?

Something was wrong and it was worrisome...more so than even the disaster we just survived. I can save her from psychopaths, I've done it several times now but I cannot protect her from illness or the pains from previous injuries.

"007 as you can see I am safe and sound in my office. You can leave. I have some calls to make and my driver will see me home."

M was trying very persistently to get me to leave again. "I will stay with you because of two words Franz said and that name you once warned me against saying on pain of death." I silently mouthed her real name to her.

Eve looked confused but M just rolled her eyes and walked into her office leaving the door open for me.

I smiled at Eve. "It's all about the small battles with her."

"Well then James, let us hope you manage to win the war. Don't let her out of your sight."

"I won't. By the way Moneypenny, has she been complaining about any pain or discomfort from her wound at Skyfall?"

"No...but she wouldn't complain if she did. Not to me, you should ask Tanner when he returns."

I nodded and followed M into her office to sit on the sofa and listen to her one sided conversation with the PM.

All the while trying not to stare at her to find out what was wrong and why she refused to discuss what went on between us and Franz in that hotel room.

Eventually she looked up from her work and sighed. "Are you serious about this?"

"About my feelings for you or what happened today in that hotel room with my bastard of a foster brother? You will have to be more specific M."

"Don't be contrary Bond...I mean sitting here the rest of the day pretending to be a bodyguard."

"I take offence to the term pretending but yes I am serious. He knows your real name...and therefore..."

"Yes...yes I know. He could possibly know where I live. I will have to make other arrangements. In the meantime could you please leave and go get something to eat or something. My bodyguards usually only guard my body outside the office 007. I can't have your eyes boring into me from across the room the rest of the day."

I stood. "I would be delighted to go get us something to eat. And my eyes do not bore...I've heard from many that they are my best feature."

"Get over yourself 007, I'm not playing this game with you. Something light Bond, I still have dinner plans for later."

"Really? After all that has happened? And you should know by now that I'm not playing any games with you M."

"Regardless Bond, I still have work to do and a life to lead."

"Fine, but do not leave the building M. Moneypenny is on guard now and you don't want to have her chase you down." I said rubbing my shoulder dramatically. M knew exactly where I took a bullet from Patrice and Eve during our chase for the stolen hard drive.

M managed a small smile but she still looked cautious as she gazed at me. She was calculating the odds that I had told her the truth and deciding what to do about it.

Damn infuriating woman, would likely try to push it all aside and ignore it, for the good of the job or some other rubbish. There was not much more that I could do to prove it to her other than my words. She should have been able to gage that I was being truthful about it after all that had happened between the two of us over the years.

To be continued...


	6. Chapter 6

 

I nodded to Moneypenny when I returned to M's office with some tea and food. The woman had likely not eaten since morning and I know I hadn't. Her luncheon was disturbed by her kidnapping. I handed Moneypenny her meal..."tuna salad, really? I would have pegged you more for a salad wrap than a school lunch favourite."

"Thank you James. It shows that you really don't know me that well James." M said with a smirk. "What about yours? Would you like to eat with me or are you saving yours to enjoy with M?" Eve said with her brow raised in question.

"I was starving and ate mine on the way back here. Saving the day really builds up an appetite."

"I bet. What did you get for M?"

"Oolong tea with a chicken salad sandwich on dark rye bread, a fruit cup and a couple of biscuits for good luck."

"Really? You surprise me Bond."

"Why is that?"

Eve just laughed and shook her head, as if she were in on some great secret knowledge and that worried me.

I entered M's office and she was not there, so I ducked my head back out into Moneypenny's office.

"Where did M go? You were not suppose to let her go anywhere without me!"

"Don't get your pants in a twist Bond she's still in there I've been here the entire time you've been gone. On pain of death remember?"

"Well she's not at her desk." I asked confused. Moneypenny began to laugh at me again.

"She's just gone to the toilet."

"Oh...she has a toilet in there?"

"You've got to be kidding me Bond. She has an entire ensuite just to the left of her desk behind a false wall. Are you telling me that you've never noticed before? It is also a safe room with a small lift in the back of a closet for her to escape should she want or need too."

"You don't suppose she's fled?"

"Why would you think that? You think she's finally sick of pausing from work to witness your longing glances across the room?" Eve said rolling her eyes.

"I will have you know...that...that they are not longing...they're normal...glances." I stammered trying to defend myself, but it sounded weak even to my ears. Go figure, that the oh so intuitive Ms. Moneypenny would know of my feelings before M herself apparently.

Eve stood and walked over to me and relieved me of one of my biscuits and winked at me. "I know you've got a secret James."

"Oh you do, do you. And what pray tell is this big secret Miss Moneypenny?"

"It's that you have a crush on the boss." Eve said nonchalantly, with a large grin on her lovely face.

I had no idea what to say to that, so I said nothing and ducked back into M's office hearing Moneypenny cackling in laughter as I left her. I placed M's sandwich, tea and some biscuits in front of her chair.

I sat and waited. Twenty minutes passed and I became more and more worried that M had slipped out through her secret lift so I went to the wall and knocked. There was no answer. I looked for the latch to gain entry and found it locked.

I took a small case out of my pocket and removed the tools that I needed to pick the lock. I managed that and opened the door. Within, was a small sitting room with a telly and a small bar fridge. It actually looked like the small sofa with a few pillows and a blanket might just pull out into a bed.

Behind the sofa was a vanity with perfume and any makeup and supplies, should M require. In my mind the entire scenario was ripe for any sort of liaison during work hours, or working late. I wandered over and picked up her perfume giving it a sniff. Now I know the brand that makes her smell of flowers and a hint of spice. The smell that lingered in my memory on many a lonely night on boring surveillance missions, waiting for the mark she wanted killed.

I moved to the side to find a sliding closet door slightly open. I look in and see a bag with her clothing from earlier, the purple lace brazier I lift for a moment then guiltily drop back into the bag. The closets hold another few sets of clothing within including Jackets for various weather, hats, a few wigs and several pairs of shoes. Most of it was business wear but there were two dresses and my hands lingered over the feel of the soft fabric on my finger tips. Imaging how she would look in them.

The opposite door suddenly opened to reveal M wrapped in nothing but a towel, sopping wet from her shower. My eyes skimmed her from head to naked feet in a nearly breathless moment.

"What the hell are you doing in here?!" M said pulling the towel around herself tighter.

"I was concerned when you weren't at your desk M. I brought some food and Oolong tea...Moneypenny told me about the room."

"A room that is for my private use only! And was bloody well locked for a reason!" M said miffed at the presumption of my intrusion into her hidden secret space.

I know I should leave but seeing her like this...it was stimulating and not just because she was almost naked. It was that she was beautiful just out of the shower, without doing her hair just so, or her make up. It was like looking at someone in a new light when you see them unguarded and pure like this. I had always hoped…I would get the chance to see her like this under slightly different circumstances.

"Well you can turn around and stop staring at me, for one! I did not slip out the back! The dust and dirt from today was getting to me so I decided to clean up once you finally stopped lingering around my office."

I turned around and heard her going to the closet. "I think you should leave 007."

"I told you M. I'm your bodyguard until we can be sure none of my foster brother's men come looking for Mrs. Mansfield. Although, now that I know you can sleep in your office it might be safer if we just camped out in here. This is a rather cozy set up you have here M." I would have winked at her if I had been facing her.

"Pufffhhhs…" M blurted out as I heard her moving behind me. "I meant that you should leave the room so that I may change. As for staying here, I have a dinner...engagement."

I let that sink in and wondered who the bloody hell she was meeting after all that had happened today that she would not cancel. "You should cancel your date M. I think I should just take you home to get a go bag and come back here for safety's sake."

"I will not change these plans because of his unsuccessful attempt to kidnap me. Blofeld, as that arrogant bastard wanted to be called, is in custody and his people will be in a state of confusion. He is too medicated to give any orders, so I'm not concerned."

"Fine." I said rolling my eyes. "I will let you get ready but I will leave the door open. Yell when your descent so I can bring you your tea while it's still warm."

"Fine...and thank you for getting me something 007."

"You know M; I think that after saving your life and pledging my love and devotion to you today, not to mention catching you in nothing but a towel, that you could at least call my by my given name."

"Fine; James thank you for your service today." M said in exasperation.

I moved to the door only turning my head to catch a quick look at her legs again. "I am always at your service M, morning, afternoon and night." I couldn't help myself.

Suddenly a shoe hit me on the upper back and I spun back fully around to see M now closing her dressing gown with another shoe in her hand ready to go. I smiled and ran out to her desk to bring her back some nourishment.

"Back for another?" M said still holding a shoe, her dressing gown now securely tied and the wet towel bunched on the floor at her feet. M was glaring at me with a slight teasing smile on her lips, ready to let loose with the other shoe. I don't think I have ever seen her look more sexy than at this moment and my heart skipped a beat.

"I think your blood sugar must be getting low M."

"You and your cheek!" I caught the other shoe and managed not to drop her food which I then placed on the small table by the sofa before fleeing the small secret room.

"When you come out I will be waiting to hear who we are meeting for dinner?" I said with a smile, as I ducked out of her hidden room.

M yelled back after I heard her chuckle. "I'm going alone Bond and you can sit here and watch the telly until I return."

I sat in the chair in front of M's desk and turned to stare at the door. Why couldn't it be easier between us. Why wouldn't she tell me who she was going to meet? Why couldn't I be ten, even twenty years older?

Now she was insisting on going on this...this mystery date. Not bloody likely. I would simply follow her to her destination, unless she had me tossed in a cell I would be her shadow.

Then I remembered M once remarking to me about shadows: ' _Just remember that shadows stay in front or behind...never on top._ '

I think I'd much rather be on top when it came to her. At least the first time.

To be continued...


	7. Chapter 7

12 hours later:

She said it was Mallory she had a dinner meeting with...no need to come.

She said not to worry, Mallory would see her home. There was question in her blue eyes, as to my instantaneous and jealous reaction, one that I couldn't help but have. I went home and had a shower, still dirty from the stress of the day. I was planning on going round to her flat after this dinner meeting. I checked in with Tanner and he said M's meeting with Mallory was going later than expected.

M should have let him come with her to meet Mallory as her bodyguard. I can barely think straight but I am sure that death would be a relief to me now.

I should have been there! I made my way in a haze to St. Mary's hospital where Tanner met me at the emergency entrance.

Moneypenny and Q arrived, shattered at the news. 005 was on his way after going over the site for any evidence. Tanner recited the information stoically...as my world dissolved.

"The explosion took out her flat and her neighbours suffered some minor damage, likely because of the special reinforcements that Q branch had installed when she moved from her penthouse flat, years ago. Mallory dropped M off at her flat at 23:00 hours and her mobile and tracer confirmed her presence along with the alarm entry code."

Like that mattered, anyone could have circumvented that code. I had on several occasions. We began making our way down to morgue in the lower floors.

I could have prevented it all...if she had only let me come or I had had the foresight to get to her flat earlier. Then we would both be dead now and I wouldn't feel such pain. _"Look how well your charm works James. How many is that now?"_ Too many. Franz! Damn him to hell!

This job...the devastation...the loss. I backed into the wall of a small dimly lit room in the basement of the hospital and my legs gave way as I slid down the wall to the floor. Eve was crying on Tanner's shoulder. Tanner was just barely holding it all together.

Q's eyes darted around between us as he paced the room occasionally pulling his glasses off and running his hands through his hair. The poor lad didn't know what to do or how to process what had happened. None of us could. We were left in this deplorable state of purgatory waiting for Mallory, who insisted it be him that identified what was left of her burned body.

The door suddenly opened and we collectively let out a breath. A doctor entered and made his way across the room we lingered in and exited the far door. I pulled myself up off the floor and straightened my jacket and tie. Tanner pulled away from a crying Eve who moved to Q's arms for comfort.

A woman and two men entered following Mallory and the PM from the morgue. I stood at silent attention and the crying woman, who was undoubtably M's daughter accepted a hug from Tanner. She must have met Tanner sometime before, which surprised me some. The dark haired woman straightened up and moved to accept condolences from the PM with her brother. Judi and Ryan Mansfield were followed by an older gentleman and I honestly had to do a double take. The man looked just like her dead husband. For a moment I thought something strange was going on but then the man introduced himself to the PM as Olivia's brother-in-law Marshall Mansfield.

The PM left us as soon as she had given her condolences to the family. Mallory spoke in muted tones to M's shocked family and then escorted them out with Tanner. I was unable to do or say anything...do anything to comfort the family of the woman I loved.

I feel as if I'm falling again. As if I might slide back down to the floor and curl into a ball. I can't crumble now. M still needed me. She would want me to find who killed her and take them out, just like Silva. But I'm so bloody numb. My shock was so complete that I didn't really notice Eve pulling me towards the exit and down the hall of the hospital. Q was speaking in low tones with her but I barely understood. Something about taking me home and watching me.

I wanted to rush to M's flat and sift through the wreckage just to find something of hers...anything. I needed to do something. I needed to crush the life out of Franz with my hands. People will die because of this!

My world was crumbling. Spectre was about to go up in flames. I don't care if MI6 are behind me or not at this point. It just didn't matter to me anymore. Nothing mattered but killing everyone who had anything to do with stealing M from me!

I will not let her death go unavenged, I hadn't let Mitchell or Silva live for attempting to kill her. I will be damned if I would after she died because of Franz.

Stuart Thomas walked towards us with an equally glum look on his face as we approached. It was at this moment that I snapped out of my shock. I'm a bloody 00, from the division that they're trying to destroy, along with the woman who protected us. I will take them down.

"Bond...I'm sorry. I was looking into Blofeld further when the explosion happened. He's still in custody so it must have been someone else in his organization or another group altogether. The chatter according to Q branch names Mr. White."

The one that got away. The only one to have threatened her and managed to allude us for years. "Are you ready to go." I heard myself ask him.

Stuart looked momentarily shocked. "My go bag is in the car. You?" He says looking at Eve and Q for some reason.

"Mine is in my car just wait and I'll get it." I now had a purpose to drive me and I will not fail her again.

"Bond! You can't!" Eve said as she grasped my arm. I merely shook her off abruptly.

"I bloody well can! We have a mission, regardless of what Tanner and Mallory say. We have to act now! There can be no waiting."

"Bond. You should clear this and allow yourself...some time. Time to grieve." Q implored.

"What! To sit around and get pissed drunk in anger at myself, Tanner and Mallory by not following up and continuing to be her bodyguard? She insisted she would be fine! WELL SHE'S NOT BLOODY WELL FINE IS SHE!"

"Bond." Eve plead with tears coming down her cheek. "Give it tonight to sleep on...and tell Tanner." We exited the hospital to the car park.

"NO! I've got 005 for back up. I trust him to keep me from going over the edge. The rest of the 00's can bloody well join us in the hunt if they like." I look to Thomas for affirmation. He nodded and looked serious as he stood tense and ready to get in his car and start this mission.

"I heard from 003 directly and the news is spreading. I told him to send out the code _The Tower has fallen_."

I nodded at him in understanding, as I ran over to where my car was parked and grabbed my gear.

"What is that code?" Q asked when I returned to them. "I'm not acquainted with it."

Thomas looked up from his phone. "There is always a government code term for when the Queen passes. 'London Bridge is down.' Well, the 00's have a code for when M…"

"Won't they all just call in for updates?" Eve asked.

"No they won't because I added a target. _Mr. White followed by 007 and 005 on it report if able_. Where are we starting Bond?"

"Q?" I asked.

"The last we had on White he was in Austria that was over 6 months ago. I began digging this afternoon after you returned with M and Blofeld was taken to hospital."

"We start in Austria. Tell the rest. We will be bringing home anyone involved with this in a body bag."

Eve looked horrified. "What about the service for...M Bond?" I took her hand and kissed it.

"I will let you represent us Eve. We need to find who did this and kill them."

Eve looked sad and concerned but she nodded in grim approval. Thomas drove us towards Heathrow while I stared out into the darkness.

* * *

It was less than satisfactory to find White already dying of poisoning.

Thomas and I made it before he shot himself in the head. His daughter on his mind. I sent Thomas after the woman to find out what she knows and keep her safe.

Tanner and Q handed me a message that arrived for me. I recognized M's hand writing. I returned to London in time for the reading of her will but did not go. Moneypenny handed me a box from the estate.

My heart pounded as I opened it, only to see Jack the bulldog staring up at me. I actually laughed for the first time since she died.

Eve was worried about me and came over to my flat so we could open the package from M. The two of us sat in my barely unpacked flat and opened M's note and package. There was a DVD and by god it ripped the heart out of me to see her. She sent me this message...she must have filmed it around the time Silva attacked.

She wanted me to find a man and kill him. I gladly accomplished the deed in a flamboyant way in the heart of Mexico City. I raced to Rome for the funeral and saved the beautiful widow who thanked me graciously with her body. She told me that they hold a conclave with the death of any made member like her husband.

With the help of 005 we took note of the members that met in the conclave after Sciarra's funeral. They were in disarray with the loss of Blofeld but they did expect him to return by the symbolic empty chair a the head of the table. That space was in darkness like a black hole in room sucking up all the warmth and goodness in the world. They chose a replacement and spoke openly of their plans. MI6 was an official target that was being worked on.

MI6 demanded that I returned but Q let me know that if I did...they would stop my rampage. Mallory was barley hanging onto MI6, the place was in turmoil with...the loss of M. We are all wandering around trying to do her final bidding while the damn government tries to dismantle the institution she helped define. Enemies are tumbling out now just because she's gone and they bloody well think that they can get away with it.

We snapped pictures of all the attendees of the conclave that Blofeld created. We gave it all to Q and I would track them down and kill each of them.

I once thought that the killing I did for MI6 was not personal but that was before they went after M. White, Mitchell and now Franz. These men deserved to die for attacking her and all the other shitty things they had done in their miserable excuses for lives.

The new M...Mallory was trying to consolidate his power and working against C, more than happy to have me out of the way. Me and the rest of the 00's were still hunting down Quantum and Spectre agents all over the world. Thomas headed back to base after telling me where White's daughter was. She had told him that there was only one place that her father could have kept his information.

* * *

I found Madeleine in Morocco. So here I was, in the hotel L'American with White's daughter while I drank vodka until I couldn't remember the way M smiled.

The blonde was sexy and it was only a matter of time...when she would stop protesting her hatred of men like me. I found the hidden room and the tapes within...I ignored them all but the one titled Vesper. I likely held her interrogation and the reason she betrayed me in my hand. White had used her and Mathis to get to me. All for the money after he shot Le Chiffre for losing over 100 million on Skyfleet. I looked at the map and the coordinates White was watching. This had to be where Blofeld had his base.

White had admitted that Blofeld and Spectre were crossing the line when it came to the selling of children. Being a father must have made an impression on the vile disgusting lump. It was too little too late, as he blew his own brains out in front of me.

Madeleine and I encountered some heavy resistance on the way to Blofeld's base of operations. C was implicated and I sent the information on to Mallory. The girl and I became lovers and I destroyed my foster brother's base.

None of this gave me what I wanted. M was still dead and my heart had been shredded apart.

Madeleine knew that someone else destroyed any chance of a relationship but we enjoyed each other's bodies while we could. I left her in London once Mallory firmly took control of MI6 and saved the 00 programme. Thomas and I headed out again to continue hunting everyone who had contact with my foster brother.

The government hated our resolve, yet loved the income the 00 section seized as proceeds of crime. Mallory somehow managed to cajole them into allowing us to continue our brutal hunt for the members of Spectre. I killed men all over the world. The women, I took into custody and many of their family members. Mallory sweat them for information and kept the CIA off our backs.

Felix met up with me in Argentina and told me to cool it...the brass in Langley had been watching and wondering about MI6's agents running around the globe assassinating people that they do business with.

I told him the story of everything that had happened since Casino Royale, Le Chiffre and Greene in Bolivia. Felix was shocked to say the least.

The CIA had not been on board with taking down Spectre when Mallory spoke to them. It had many powerful members within the ranks of their own government. This was the case with many countries, friendly and adversarial to Great Britain.

We parted ways amicably and he said he would report what was going really going on. In other words, Felix would tell them to stay the hell out of my way.

It was not just me being a one man wrecking ball. All the 00's were in on the action. Thomas took out at least three on his own and two with me.

There were low level scumbags that died in ditches and the streets. Some extremely wealthy businessmen on yachts ended up in watery graves or dead in the lap of luxury in which they lived.

Members of governments all over the world were lost to long range bullets to the head and the papers were speculative to reasons why. Soon after, the level of which these men were involved with nasty things was brought to light in the press. Often with the help of Q who was enjoying exposing everything to do with the bastards the moment they were taken out.

We all felt the sting of M's loss. Franz killed her just because she got too close to Spectre's operation. Therefore, his group must die in flames, the bottom of the ocean or in a hail of bullets, so long as they died.

Q went through all M's files and even the old retired Q came in to help with some older information on threads to this shady organization. Once a thread was found it would lead to another and another until they were all gone or imprisoned.

I almost enjoyed killing Spectre, if you could call it a feeling, it was the only thing I could enjoy now. Finding their hidden bases and blowing them up made me feel a sense of accomplishment. I imagined that my M would have complained about my expenses, but give me one of those rare smiles that had the ability to warm me from head to foot, for a job well done.

It had been over a year since M died. My time as a 00 was almost up. I'm too old for this game now and I should be dead 10 times over.

So here I was at last, sitting in a pub and having a pint with Tanner to discuss my departure from MI6. I had nothing left to give and Spectre was practically dust. Nothing but a vacuum was left for small local criminal organizations to try to take over.

The call came as a bit of a shock to me but Franz asked to see me at Belmarsh. I knew that he would be the last thing I took care of. I had already sold my flat and put almost everything into storage.

I will end him and then it will all be over.

They may arrest me...I may die...or I may escape to the Bahama's and the house I bought there in my late aunt's name. Whatever happened, it would be over and so will I.

Without M to give me direction...I can't go on much longer. Revenge had become my entire life and I gave it my all, as it burnt up whatever was left inside me.

I don't want to take my own life...I could make it quick but I think that the alcohol will do it's job within a few lonely bitter years.

All that mattered now was that Franz died, knowing that I destroyed all that he had built.

To be continued...


	8. Chapter 8

 

I arrived at Belmarsh just before noon and I walked into the prison. They took my credentials and relieved me of my firearm, as if that were the only way I could kill a man.

"What is the purpose of your visit here today agent Bond?" The security asked me.

"Blofeld, my foster brother asked to see me. Before you ask...I'm the one who put him here."

"Blofeld? The German bloke? He's a strange one, usually just sings songs in various languages, usually the spider and the fly according to most. He's in the special wing follow the yellow markers." He said handing me a visitor's pass.

My mobile rang, it was Tanner.

" _Bond where are you?"_

"Franz requested that I visit and I'm more than happy to give him the news that Spectre is dead in person."

" _Bond what are you planning?"_

"I don't know what you mean Bill." I answered as innocently as I could manage.

" _If you are about to do what I think you are planning...there will be no coming back. M will not be able to save you this time."_

I knew it would not fool Tanner...he knew that I could not go on long without my M. "Maybe I don't want to be saved...it's too late for that now."

" _Bond do not do anything rash! She would not have wanted you to end like this. Let it go!"_

"She? Moneypenny? No she wouldn't, you can say goodbye for me Bill."

" _Bond...don't! You know I mean M! Please...there's something...don't do it...I cannot tell you over a call but trust me! There is a reason you cannot go down this path! Turn around and leave Belmarsh and meet me at the pub near work!"_

"Tell Q...the same. Both him and the old man. Mallory...tell him...tell him that he made a fairly good M. That he got a lot done under less than ideal circumstances. Bringing down C and the British arm of Spectre was a great deed. We rooted out all the bad ones didn't we Tanner."

_"Bond please stop this now! Don't commit to this...end."_

I could hear the frustration and sadness in Tanner's voice...it made me almost well up. "No Bill. It's too late for all of that. Goodbye." He had become a better friend than I ever expected. I pressed end call and continued down the hall to an open area with metal tables.

I just needed Franz within reach arm's reach and not behind protective glass to kill him. My mobile rang again. This time it was M, Mallory. I owed it to him to say goodbye after the limb he climbed out on over the last year. Just to allow me and the other 00's the opportunity to chase down every lead to eliminate Spectre.

"Hello."

" _Bond...good you answered. Tanner told me where you are. You cannot do this! He's a prisoner and it would be unsanctioned murder!"_

"Then bloody well sanction it! You and I both know that he has just been biding his time healing from his wounds this past year. Now that we took out all the major players he's likely to try his escape. Franz is too dangerous to ever leave this place! I might as well save the money her Majesty spends to keep him locked up."

" _M would never have allowed this and neither will I 007!"_

"M's dead and it's all because of Franz."

" _Bond you have to come back in...I have a mission for you. Another arm of Quantum has peaked it's ugly head up with the demise of Spectre. I want you and Thomas to take it out."_

"If that was true why didn't you have Tanner use that excuse?" I hit end call and it rang yet again...Eve's number and there was a text from Q that just read _STOP...NO BOND!_. I ignored the call and text, sat down to wait for them to bring Franz.

Franz walked in the room with his one dead eye and a bit of a limp from his bad leg. The bastard still had that know it all smirk plastered on his face, as they pulled him into the open room.

"Well, my dear brother James. How are you doing?"

"I've been great Franz. Very busy dismantling everything you've made. The government loves me for once. I've been filling her Majesty's coffers with your ill gotten gains."

"You will never find it all James and it will never bring you back the women you've lost. Isn't it a horrible feeling? To have the love of your life ripped from you not only once...but twice! I don't know how you stand it personally. Drink? Likely the booze is hardening your liver as much as I have your heart. Mayhap you've been spending the last year drowning in a lot of nameless women?" Franz opened his arms wide and leaned back in his metal chair to cross his arms over his chest.

"That always worked in the past...eh James? Oh and I heard from a little bird that you and or another of MI6's brutal 00's found White at the end. And then his daughter before my associates could kill her. I would have liked to have met Madeleine again. I saw her last when she was only nine."

"She is fine and safe from you. What was left of Spectre is now gone. Unless you plan to use whatever friend's you've made in here...they should know however that you've no money left. No property, luxuries, cars or hollowed out volcanoes for you to hide in. Should someone be fooling enough to try to release you." I said loud enough to be heard by the guards hovering in this high security room.

"I really want to know...did you sleep with her?"

"What?"

"You heard me James. Did you sleep with Madeleine to make the pain of losing your beloved M...a little...less...unbearable?"

My hands clenched involuntarily into fists as I ground my teeth. I think the bastard actually wanted me to end him!

"I have to tell you, that I was shocked to hear the old gal was blown up. I had nothing to do with it. I hope that you will believe me. I was rather taken with her once we met that day. I had planned on taking her with me after killing, or at least maiming you. Instead...this happened." He pointed to the dramatic scar down his face and his blank white eye.

"You are a terrible liar Franz. I've had enough of you being allowed to remain breathing when it would be better for the world if you were dead."

"Better for the world or better for you James Bond?" Franz pulled away from me in a false dramatically concerned manner. "I see...so you are here to kill me is that it? You are done and want these guards to shoot you after you kill me...or perhaps become an inhabitant of this...lovely prison. I would have slept with her."

"Who Madeleine?"

"Nein..non...no...M. If I had managed to get to my helicopter. I would have flown her to Paris and spent a weekend making love to her."

I slamed my fist on the table. "She would never...!"

"You think I would have given her a choice...nein. I would have taken your drugged and beaten body with us to ensure that she would acquiesce to my ravenous sexual appetite."

I stood suddenly as my rage gripped me but I was then distracted from my goal. My mobile vibrated on the metal table and I glanced down. Eve was trying to call again and Q had continued texting. I ignored Eve's call. I looked down on the man I hate more than anything in this world. Franz looked to the door suddenly nervous and about to call out.

My mobile rang and shook in my hand. I was going to ignore it but something made me glance down to see the name Boothroyd. That gave me pause. Why would the old man be calling me?

"I think you should take that call brother dearest." Franz said as he stood and backed away from me in fear.

"Why did you get to the Major too?"

"Major who?" He said with confusion, his one good eye twitching and a sweat breaking out as he searched the room for anyone or thing that could keep me away from him.

I moved around the table threateningly and the vibration ended but Boothroyd sent a text.

_-She's alive.-_

I stared for a moment and just looked at my phone. She...the only she that the major would rush to tell me about would be…

_-Don't do it! And bloody well answer your phone!-_

The mobile shook in my hand again and I answered. "Major...Q?"

The voice hit me like a brick upside the head. My heart began to pound and my palms sweat. My breathing quickened in apprehension, much more than my intended killing of Franz had managed.

" _007! Do not do anything as stupid to make them kill or arrest you over him! He did not kill me! I killed myself...with some help."_

"M? Why?" I said in confusion.

_"I needed to focus on tracking down all of Spectre and I've been using you 00's to eliminate the threat, while remaining hidden from them and everyone. You know as well as I that no one looks for the dead. Now don't touch him."_

I looked to Franz who appeared perplexed by my apparent bafflement. I plop back down on a seat unable to speak.

" _Bond, put me on speaker please."_

I managed to comply with M's order but still...there was so much…

" _Mr. Blofeld or Franz Oberhauser, whatever you want to be called._ _You do not have that nest egg that you thought you did. You knew I was getting close so you abducted me. I have used the last year, with the help of some old friends to take down your most secret of resources. "_

"That is impossible! How can you be alive?" Franz looked amazed and then his demeanour changed to genuine confusion.

" _You never thought I had the forethought to instigate my own death? You did it once and like a phoenix you said. Well like so many others, you underestimated me Blofeld and that was your undoing."_

"It would be impossible for you to gain access to everything!" Blofeld said, becoming very angry.

" _Swiss bank accounts number 900-2103 and 876-0238, properties in Vienna and Cologne and their contents. I will say that your mistresses were very cooperative. I let them take the clothes and jewels they were wearing and did not have them incarcerated for their statements and knowledge about any other holdings."_

"You! I will find you and I will get out of this place and when I do...I will take you...again and again! Just for the fun of making Bond pay and you squirm and beg for death!"

" _And here I thought you liked me Franz. I did like your taste in homes. I even stayed in them overnight just to see if anyone else would arrive. I claimed I was your mother and had an easy time of recovering every farthing you had with your death certificate in hand and a letter from some fake estate lawyers. James leave that prison at once! You may come see me now."_

I stood and quickly punched Franz in the face, watching him crumble to the floor unconscious.

"Aye, ma'am. I will be there as fast as I can. Where are you?"

I began walking quickly out of the visitors area with several guards looking miffed for what I had done. They knew I was special services so they did nothing to retaliate. They would be more angered from what M had said about Franz's promises of wealth being a worthless lie. There was no money waiting for him or any who helped him.

Once I gathered my things at the entrance, I made my way outside the gates and to my car. I asked again. "M...where are you?" It even sounded pained to my own ears. "How could you?"

" _James...I'm really very sorry but he had people everywhere and I remembered Vesper. I didn't want to leave but I had too. Please understand."_

"Where have you been this last year?" Even to my own ears I sounded angry and betrayed.

" _Not now. I'll put the kettle on and we can discuss this when you get here."_

"Where are you? With your children?"

" _No. I'm staying with Boothroyed...Q. I stayed for a spell with Mallory, as his aunt. I left there because he would not let me out of the house, even with a disguise. Besides, Q and I were on the trail of Spectre and working together anyway, so I moved in."_

"Living with...as in...flatmates?" I asked hesitantly, hoping that there was nothing romantic between the two of them. I sped away from the prison towards his heart's desire.

" _Bond just drive and we will discuss this face to face."_

"I hope you don't mind that I plan on kissing you the second I get there and I desperately hope that you and the old man are not…"

" _Bond!"_

"I had to ask. You don't mind if you stay on the line so that we can talk the entire way. I found his address in my mobile but I will refrain from saying it out loud."

" _Good. I don't mind speaking with you James. I was getting a little worried about you and then Tanner called me in a panic."_

"Tanner knew!"

" _Yes he and Mallory cleared my house that day, before they used what Boothroyd and I dug up about Max Denbigh to bring him down. Q and I had this all planned long ago should things become desperate."_

"Mallory, Tanner and who else?"

" _Just the PM and Q...Boothroyd of coarse. The new Q and Moneypenny didn't know and I had to have everyone think their reactions, and those of my children were real. Unfortunately that included you. Blofeld was personally going to watch you regardless. I had to be sure and I had to make you suffer to do it...for that I am so very sorry."_

Tears began falling from my eyes as I headed towards the Boothroyd's flat, wishing that I could drive faster to get to her. "I just can't...I've dreamed about the sound of your voice for over a year...it's honestly been the hardest year of my life M."

" _I'm so sorry James but remember...I'm not M anymore."_

_To be continued..._


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After all the angst and drama, here is a fluffy reunion chapter.

**Chapter 9**

When I arrived I ran up the steps of the flat as M opened the door. I practically barrelled into her picking her up and holding her to me. Whispering into her ear about how much I loved and missed her. I placed my lips on her neck and then paused wondered if I had gone too far too fast.

"James! Put me down." She said laughing and more than a little shocked at what I was doing.

"Hello there 007. I see you found the old place eh?" I placed M back on the floor keeping my arm around her.

"I did old man. How have you been, here hiding in the shadows looking after my future wife?"

The old Q had a smile on his face that turned to shock, as M stood looking at me like I was deranged and threw her hands up in the air.

"You can't be serious?"

"Why not. I told you that I was in love with you the very day you died. You tried everything you could to be a complete bitch and not discuss it with me. You wouldn't even look me in the eyes at one point. And I have suffered brutally every day that you've been gone."

I said this to her trying not to make this a miserable fight but I sensed that was the only place this would lead. I wanted a joyful reunion and even though the pain of losing her was vanishing quickly, it still left this overwhelming sense of bitterness in it's wake. Too many emotions are swimming through my head with her here and in my arms.

"How could you hide from me M?" I could see that she was uncomfortable by my questioning and so was the old man. "You never expected to see me again. Did you?" I asked incredulously in sudden realization.

"No I didn't James but it was for your own safety, you had work to do. I had to give you a chance at a different life should another Vesper arise…"

"She wasn't...you were the only one. The only woman I've ever pictured marrying."

"Yes but surely you've gone off that fantasy? I heard about you and White's daughter."

"Of course you would mention that to pull away from what I asked." I added bitterly and then just sighed. I would have to work through this somehow, if I wanted her in my life the way I did.

If I make her bristle against me there would be little chance of that. I know her too well to push too hard too fast. But I'm so very tempted to push her up against the wall and not let her up for air. Prove to her how much I want her.

Instead I grabbed her hand and kissed it as we moved into Q's kitchen. Q lived in a small country town with a nice little house and garden outside of London in Frensham. "And I don't think we need to talk about her she's long gone. How about I help you pack your bag instead?" I said a cheekily as possible. Desperate to get her alone so I could show her how mad she drove me.

Q and M both look at me perplexed. "I will bring you to my flat until we're forced to leave it. I've sold my flat. Since you went to the extreme of destroying your flat, we will have to find something or retire to the islands."

"James! You can't be serious?"

Q laughed as he brought out some biscuits and tea. "I think you should go with the lad. London should be safe enough for you now my dear."

I must have frowned at him referring to M as _dear_ because Q waved his hand at me. "She and I have been good friends for a very long time and it was easy to tell it was driving her mad not being in the driver's seat and overseeing your missions directly. The second hand reports from Tanner would make her fume around the house for ages. Only you could get under her skin to that extent 007."

I kissed her hand again. Unwilling to let her go for even a moment to drink her tea. M laughed and it felt like the sun had just risen on a cold morning.

God I loved her so much...being this close and having to curtail all my passions with social niceties was driving me mad. When all I wanted to do was ravage her over and over again.

I think she felt the same way. At least she smiled at me and kept my hand in hers. That was a good sign.

"I knew it!"

"What?"

"That you had feelings for me too." I winked at her and I cannot help but have the most massive, likely stupid looking grin on my face.

"Oh really...do you think so...007? I think you may have been hit on the head one too many times." M said blankly.

"Come on now...don't string the lad along. I saw it years ago...even when Nigel was still living. I wondered if the two of you would finally divorce once you realized your feelings for this egotistical destroyer of all my best equipment!"

"Q!" M said indignantly but a smirk came to her face that alleviated my sudden apprehension.

"Thank you major for that vote of approval." I added.

"Oh tosh...go pack your bags and make the young lad happy for once. You know that no other woman could, but you. And I saw that the moment I was in the same room with the both of you. I just shook my head then and there and thought...my...my they've each met their match in each other."

"I think you're looking at the past with far better vision than I Q." M said. "I thought he hated me...considered me a cold accountant."

"Oh I did but underneath...I have a thing for women in power."

"Really?" M said lifting her eyebrow just so, as she stood and pulled away from my grasp to put the dishes in the dishwasher. Then M moved around the table to pat Q on the shoulder.

"I suppose you could use some quiet in your retirement and I could use a change of scenery Q. I will go pack my things and get ready."

"I can help." I offered.

"No James...you would not be very helpful I think." M winked at me and I growled. I don't like letting her out of my sight but I stayed downstairs with the old man pacing in anticipation.

"007 you have to calm down. Don't rush her like you would a younger women. Our generation was different and the age gap may make her try to pull away from you if you push too hard."

"I know...its just...been such a terrible year. I hadn't much left. I was going to kill him and then be done with it all."

Q but his hand on my shoulders. "I know lad. That's why we called. Tanner was practically in tears. M told him under no circumstances could he tell you about Olivia. Betrayal of the secrets act and all that blither bother. His only recourse was to call us to contact you. I was terrified you wouldn't answer or recognize my number."

"I'm sure you could have broken through somehow...you've still got equipment all over the house I see." We walked down the hall into a den after he allowed me to pace in the living area. Every room, each with their own computer lab setup and with gadgets strewn all about.

"Yes and I was about to hijack your mobile's camera to give you a live feed of Olivia sitting at the kitchen table with me but you answered." Q stated. "You had better look after our girl Bond. No messing about with this one. Unless she sets you free...you are not. Do you understand?"

"Yes...I understand perfectly. I will not screw this up...look." I pulled out my mobile and begin typing to M. I show Q and he nods and smiles.

"There. I am no longer a 00 or even an employee of MI6. I will deal with Tanner later. I will have to go in for a formal and final meeting and clear out my desk tomorrow. I will ask if Olivia would like to come with me in disguise to allay poor M's fears and give Moneypenny a fright."

At that point Olivia made herself known at the top of the stairs. "James come collect this luggage please."

"I would be delighted...M?" She looked so strange in an auburn wig and sunglasses. A sexy grey jumper under a dark blue double breasted trench coat. Dark flared trousers and boots with a good three inch heel to them.

"M...I love the new look." I said with a leer and a smile. I couldn't believe how my heart was fluttering...the sheer joy of looking at her again.

To be truthful, I was angry with her and with everyone who knew. However, the joy outweighed any of that now. We would discuss all this at length later. I took her things out to the car as M said goodbye to Q. I looked back to witness her giving the old man a hug and a kiss. It made me frown for a moment, my jealousy rising but she claimed they were just living together? We would be discussing this also, among a million other things.

It's now late afternoon by the time M got everything packed and ready. My mobile rang...it was Tanner. I answered as M said goodbye and walked down the steps towards me. The sway of her hips hypnotizing me for a moment as I answered Tanner absentmindedly.

"Yes."

" _Bond! Good so you got the message."_

"Yes I did. I'm picking up the package as we speak and it will be at my flat with me tonight."

" _Eve and I will meet you there later. We have things to discuss."_

"Give me until 20:00. I'm hungry...for dinner, then come around to my flat." I said with a frown not wanting to share her on the first evening I've gotten her back.

" _Hungry? I bet you are. Don't push yourself too far Bond, we just got the package back, don't break it. We will give you until 20:00 then. Bond, M said to ask you to say hello for him and he hopes to see his favourite aunt soon."_

I help M into my car and we head back towards London.

"M we need to talk. Do you want to stop at a pub?"

"I'm not M, 007 and yes...I suppose we had better."

I frowned. "Try not to make it sound like such an arduous task OLIVIA. It's not like I didn't just kill over 100 people in retribution for your supposed murder!"

M had the audacity to roll her eyes. I drove into the city heading to a pub near my flat I knew of but had never gone, so it should be perfect. Neutral ground for the war the two of us were about to wage in my car that will likely spill over into the pub.

"Oh...and I suppose I was living it up in the lap of luxury, laughing about it the entire bloody time! My children and grandchildren were lost to me! I gave up everything but my life! Everything I cared about, I had to push aside for all this time. I couldn't shop, go to the theatre, anything I liked to do for the first few months for fear of running into someone I knew!

"Fine...I give up! We've both been living in hell because of a demented bastard that was suppose to be like an older brother to me. This is all my doing. If he hadn't made the connection with Silva…"

"No...no...no! You do not take the blame for Silva. What he became was completely my fault and my burden to bear."

"He almost killed you and as you can see that would have nearly killed me. It hasn't done me much good being without you in my life. I stayed with you in Scotland in hospital the entire time. How could you not know how much I loved you?" I said quietly.

"I know you did James but that was then..." M answered just a quietly as she placed her small hand on my arm while I drove. I took my hand off the wheel to hold her hand in mine. "Now...I thought enough time would have passed. That Madeleine was…"

"Madeleine? No she could never mean as much to me as you."

"I see...so it didn't last long?"

I shook my head somewhat embarrassed about Maddie and our time together now that I knew M was alive and watching from a distance. "Who told you?"

"Tanner...he overheard you and Eve discussing it. You and Eve have become close confidants through all this?"

"Yes. You don't have to…"

"No...no I never thought that about the two of you. I'm just glad that you've had a friend. And Q, I hear the two of you have become friends after all."

"What are you implying M?"

"Nothing but that at first you were reluctant because of his age."

"It is you that is reluctant about age difference, not I M."

"In my defence it's only natural to be...hesitant in trusting...as you had qualms about Q...I have them about you and the truth of your intentions."

"To tell you the truth; I don't actually know when I began to fall in love with you but it was always there. I cared for you straight away and...well it grew over the years. It shocked me how much I needed you. After Mitchell...I went after Greene and Quantum with everything I had because of you...not her...not Vesper. I hope you realize that."

"It has taken me all this time to even understand your affection towards me. I naturally thought that your concern for me was placing me in a mother or father like position in your life. You teased and pestered me, alway protecting me by doing your job to the best of your abilities, even when I had to go in to answer for your actions. And on several occasions, in defence of your actions, I was at least able to deliver the Minister a successful mission in the end."

"I never thought of you as a mother figure M. I want you M...in every way imaginable." I turned from watching the road to look at her. M turned bright pink to almost red and looked out of the window swallowing hard. I know enough of body language to know that she has been thinking about that too.

"I can't believe…"

"M...believe." I said looking at her again and winking. "I've been imagining getting you back to my flat since I heard your voice on my mobile...and the way you bitched out Franz...I could barely walk to the car."

"James! I'm old enough to…"

"Don't say…' _be my mother'_. We've just been over this."

"I was going to say old enough to know better."

"And wise enough to throw caution to the wind? You are no longer my boss. It would not be against the rules in any way."

"No...But I was leading you on those missions, even if you didn't know it at the time. Sciarra, that was Boothroyd and I. We also found the leads to White's daughter because Mallory was so bogged down in the shifting political landscape. What with all the trouble of trying to get solid evidence about C and stop that merger from ever happening. So in a sense, I knew I was leading you to someone who could heal your broken heart."

"You weren't. That was why they wanted you out of the way...isn't it?" M nodded. "That doctor...Rutherford the day of your kidnapping. He was trying to get you to retire."

"Yes he was and I made sure that night that Mallory knew that he was a mole and needed to be watched or removed."

"Why did you go dinner with Mallory that night?"

"I was being watched but Mallory and Tanner were not. They went earlier to empty my flat of what I wanted saved. Then Boothroyd and some retired agents I'm still in contact with, helped rig the explosives and find a Jane Doe to be my body replacement. The woman had been shot so it worked out well as far as assassinations go. The dinner was to go over the final plan and make sure that they got everything I wanted saved."

"The dinner date that you would not cancel. I wondered at the time why you needed to make such a public display that night for Mallory of all people."

"The real problem was to keep you away from my flat and by having a very public dinner with Mallory, I knew you would be outside waiting and watching."

"I was but then Tanner called me...oh...he deliberately called me back to base for nothing and you were getting escorted home by three of ours to make sure you got home safe."

"And I did...the explosion happened after I arrived home and no one was injured as I slipped out the back door in a wig to Mallory's car and then to his flat."

"That night was terrible...I still can't believe that Tanner managed that...he looked about to break just like the rest of us. Mallory took calm control of the situation and getting to know him, that seems his only way of functioning."

"He doesn't scream at you like I did? You must have at least enjoyed that change." M said as I parked the car. "The information that lead Boothroyd and I to Sciarra was in my flat as well as keepsakes from my life that I didn't want destroyed. Thanks to calm, collected Mallory it was saved and put in storage."

We made it to the pub and found a quiet spot in the corner. I went to order at the bar and asked about food. I chose a few things from the menu they had available, since the post work dinner rush was done. I kept looking to the corner booth to make sure M was still there. M's eyes cased the place like a hardened criminal waiting for something bad to happen.

The barmaid came with two pints. "So sweet you out with your Ma." She said flirtatiously.

"She is my lover not my Ma." I said still smiling waiting for the shock and embarrassment to settle over the woman.

"I'm sorry...I just thought...well she is a lucky one then, isn't she." She smiled nervously.

"No, I am, I can assure you." I paid for the drinks and the food that would be out shortly as the woman then went to the other end of the bar to serve others and whisper in low tones to the regulars about us.

"You just had to do that didn't you." M said with her arms crossed in front of her. "How embarrassing."

"Yes for her. Not me. You are the most refined, beautiful and intelligent woman in this place and by looking beyond your age they should see that too. I think they likely do now."

"No they think I have money and you are my toy boy. That's what they think."

"What...I've a destroyed estate in Scotland that says I have more than you likely have at this point. Unless the PM let you get at your pension that is."

"Mallory, Tanner and Boothroyd made sure I did."

"Good so we will have enough money to retire to the Bahamas then?"

M took a sip and smiled. "Bahama's eh? Just the two of us?"

"Yes unless you plan to bring others along in this relationship."

"Well know that you mention it…"

"What...what did you do M?" I asked worriedly. "And why exactly did Mallory put you on house arrest? What did you get yourself involved in, besides espionage while you were supposedly dead?

"Mallory had me on house arrest after I went out one night in disguise to a pub, much like this one down the street from his house. As if it was the bloody Victorian era and I couldn't be out alone."

"What happened?"

"I was in a wig like this one only blonde and an amorous older gentleman insisted on walking me home to my dear nephew's house. You should have seen the look on Mallory's face." M said with a laugh.

"I can imagine it looked much like mine does now." I said in a serious tone but M only laughed as the woman came to deliver us our meal of roast pork and apples with, potatoes and peas. "I would have killed the man."

"James...he really was just being gentlemanly and made sure I got home alright."

"Did he ask you if your nephew was going to be home?"

M pause to think about that. "Yes I think he did, why?"

"He wanted to be invited in...to continue the evening. Look I don't want to discuss other men coming onto you while I was wallowing in a world of grief and violent rage."

"Wallowing in the arms of at the very least one very sexy blonde woman I think."

M began to laugh again at my expression of complete agitation. "She….she was a heat of the moment thing and she just wanted to change me. You're a damn sexy woman and I'm not alone in thinking this. Your husband most definitely must have thought so."

"Maybe 30 years ago but it wore thin what with me not being around or a proper mother as he once referred to me. He hated my job...loved the money, but hated that I was more successful and never home. In his defence, I could hardly stop being the boss once home...I occasionally forgot that my family could not and should not be ordered around like unruly agents."

"So it was not all marital bliss? I wondered after Boothroyd made a comment about being surprised you never divorced him."

"I think that was in the works on his side but then he got ill and needed me to look after him. His illness did not last long only a few months but in that time we stopped fighting and began talking and that was a gift for me. I think it was for him too."

"I'm sure it was."

"I like to think that. I read him all his favourite poetry and we spoke of politics and life...we talked of the children and old times. I was ready for him to go, yet when he did...the loneliness hit me hard. The flat was so empty. I was too alone with my thoughts and nothing to focus on but work."

I reached over and took her hand in mine. "I'm so sorry M. I was out of country when he passed and didn't want to intrude when I returned. I didn't barge in like usual, because I assumed you might have family around and need to grieve. I should have made my intentions clear immediately. But I was sure you would shoot me or have me imprisoned for the slight."

"It was not for you to be concerned about my relationship with my husband James. I just still don't understand you? You do understand that I'm 23 years older than you...I mean do you actually plan on a long term affair...or…"

"M...I will be in this for the rest of the time we have together."

To be continued...


	10. Chapter 10

 

Once we arrived at my flat, M removed her auburn wig and ran her fingers through her short white hair. This made her look just like I had remembered. I was tempted to pull her into an embrace but she was too busy looking around the flat. Considering that I had basically told her she had to move in until we made more concrete plans, I suppose that was natural. I was busy enjoying watching her move around and look at things. I was enjoying just being alone in the same room as her.

However, whenever I came close to her she seemed to shy away a little. I know that when I did look at her she looked away and blushed.

"M...I will not jump you until you are comfortable with all this...I promise."

"It's just that this is so new...fast...but I suppose you always did move fast with a target in your sights."

"I will admit my impatience but I respect you and want you fully involved with this once we begin. It will take time for you to be use to me touching you in an intimate manor. I understand this. You've been a widow for years and married a long time before that."

"Thank you James. Just that you understanding what I'm going through, alleviates my trepidation."

I poured us each a drink and we sat and enjoy being beside each other again after so long. It wasn't long until the knock sounded.

Tanner arrived with Eve at my flat around 21:00. Eve squealed in delight hugging M to her and crying.

I cornered Tanner in the hall as Eve dominated Olivia for the moment.

"You and I need to have a little chat!" I said threateningly through clenched teeth, while grabbing him by the shoulders. Tanner looked downcast and sad rather than try to explain himself.

"I know."

"Not what I expected." I said to him honestly.

"No and do what you will Bond. I've been expecting this...between us...if M's whereabouts were ever finally known to you."

"007 release him now!" I heard M say in that no nonsense tone of hers. I released Tanner and brushed his jacket sleeves with my hands smiling suddenly. Bill looked at me apprehensively as if to be expecting more. He was expecting a punch at least but M...she would kill me for hurting Tanner.

M gave Bill and hug.

"How long has it been since you two have seen each other?" I asked wondering how they managed the past year.

"Months now. Christmas...I came by Q's...Boothroyd's with some gifts." Tanner said.

Now it was Eve's turn to swat Tanner on the arm. "I can't believe you of all people managed to keep this from us Bill!"

M laughed. "It was only on the pain of my own very real death, that M and I managed to make him see reason. He had to grieve me and remain out of contact for many months before it was safe for the occasional call."

We all found seats and I mixed a few drinks, handing one to each. "What I want to know is how this all went down so suddenly. I remember you being distracted after the abduction and having your evening dinner with Mallory. As we already discussed that meeting was to finalize your arrangements." I said as way of explanation to Eve.

"Yes and Bill was at my flat making sure everything was out and then he rushed back to work to meet you. We went over the final plan by burner mobiles with Mallory and Tanner. Ordering you away...that was the hardest thing to do."

"The explosion was timed so that I could be at work late and seen by witnesses when the security alert happened at M's flat. Mallory was in a car the next street over and picked M up after she walked through the house one last time and then triggered the timer after leaving out the back." Tanner added.

"Mallory took me to his flat where he had made up his spare room for me."

"I'm sure that was comfortable. How did Mallory handle suddenly having a flatmate?" Eve asked with raised eyebrows.

"Well he had several suitcases of my clothing and even supplied me with this wig and a new alias of his recently deceased aunt Margaret."

"And Margaret escaped his flat eventually and hit the local pubs." I said with a knowing smirk.

"Oh...Mallory...M mentioned that...your amorous gentleman that insisted on bringing you home." Tanner said. Eve began to chuckle as M turned pink in embarrassment again.

"Now that Blofeld's entire network is down will you be rejoining the living M?" Eve asked excitedly. "Will you become M again or has Mallory got the job?

"No the PM was sworn to secrecy as long as I remained retired. He did guess that I have been filtering information to M about Spectre over the last year but with all the proceeds of crime the government has been getting as a result, he was more than happy to ignore what the double O programme was doing for once."

"Where will you live M?" Eve asked.

"It's Olivia Mansfield dear. Two Ms is as confusing as dealing with there being two Qs."

"Olivia...that will take time to get use too. You are staying here? With James?" Eve said.

"I feel confident that M will be joining me in the Bahamas soon. I just hope that she will consent to marrying me first." I said, shocking Tanner. Eve just smiled as if she already knew the reason from long ago.

"What! Are you...indeed?" Tanner said with a smile. "I knew it would be harder for you with her faked death than anyone and I hated seeing you almost kill yourself to get those members of Spectre. Knowing that they were on a list that you didn't even know was provided by M herself. Honestly James, it was not easy to keep from you."

"Yes...I was living it all the while you were…"

"We have to try and leave that in the past James." M said as she touched my arm gently.

"I know." I said with a frown. "I will let you make it up to me." I said as she smirked at me. "You will marry me won't you?"

"I don't want to answer that yet. I had honestly never thought to ever marry again. I was married to Nigel for over 40 years and that was all I thought I would ever have." M said to us with a sad smile and my heart plummeted but M placed her hand back on my arm and said something to give me hope. "I've had a year to consider what you said to me that day...and I will admit that I always treated you differently than the others. I suppose you wormed your way into my old heart."

"You are not old to me and I can't imagine letting you out of my sight again. With or without a ring."

"This is amazing!" Eve said excitedly. "Please say that you won't run away. Just say that we can be there if you ever decide too?"

"Of course you can." M said. I can feel myself smile broadly that she is considering a life with me. I will not crumble should she not wish to actually marry. Living in sin is good too.

Everything was turning up roses but then Tanner's mobile buzzed. Tanner looked at his mobile. "I think we need to focus on this instead. Blofeld escaped!"

"WHAT!" The rest of us said in unison.

I stood quickly and turned out all the lights in the flat and drew the drapes, peeking out on the street beneath us.

"Tanner take M...go to base and keep her there in her...M's hidden room. He will be after us and on his way. Eve...I have a job for you." I handed the wig that was on the table to M and she pulled it on, her hands shaking nervously. I grabbed them in mine and pulled them to my chest.

"Bond...I should stay…"

"No M. You need to be away from me...he wants me dead and you...well, he will want you to see it. And I have no doubt that he will then take you...I saw it in his eyes that day. He wanted to take you away from me. He wanted the affection the two of us had. Blofeld wanted everything that he thought I had with you. That is what this has always been about...me and what I've taken from him and what he can take from me."

"I don't want to leave you again." M said standing beside me holding my arm. I pulled her into a sudden kiss not wanting to let go and not caring that there was an audience. Hating that this was the first I'd managed to actually kiss her since we'd been reunited.

All I'd managed at the old man's flat was a short kiss on her neck and forehead as I drank up her scent. I don't want to leave her now but I needed to kill Franz more. I can't let him near her again.

I turned to Tanner. "Smuggle her in, don't let anyone see her. The wig will help and just stick to the...she's Mallory's aunty story. Go...go now Bill." I gave her arm to Bill and looked him in the eyes trying to convey the importance of this mission. "Not like with Silva, during that hearing where you ignored Q's warnings Tanner. Take her now and make sure she is safe."

Bill swallowed hard and nodded as he pulled M out the door with him, all the while on the phone with Mallory. "The tower of London has been rebuilt and is on its way home."

I turned to look at a worried expectant Moneypenny. "Eve...we have work to do."

To be continued...


	11. Chapter 11

 

The room sat in silence. The lights outside the windows of my flat casted a pinkish-orange glow in the room. I opened the drapes wide and sat in my lounge chair facing the door. The door was left unlocked...there was no reason to lock it.

It had now been four hours since M fled with Tanner. They're safely at MI6 where it would be impossible for Franz to get her. She's likely in that secret room she had, sleeping on the pull out bed. My memory lingered on catching her there after her shower over a year ago now.

I have a drink resting on the arm of my chair and my gun on the other when I hear footfalls in the outer hallway. I drank the rest of the drink and placed the glass on the floor beside my left foot.

The footsteps reached the door as someone tried the handle. The door eased open in the gloom. The person entering the room was the size and shape of Franz but he was also pushing someone else inside the room with him.

"Stay there." I said from my spot frozen in my chair.

Franz pushed the small form into the beam of light from the outside and leaned over to turn on the lamp beside the sofa. There was a small blonde child, wided eyed and gagged, hands tied in front of her. She must have been no more than 10 or 11 years old.

"James...you've been waiting for me I see. I'm sorry that I took so long but I had to go find my little friend here. Where is my future bride?"

"Bride?"

"M...you knew that I would come for her? After all, I need to correct all this mess you've caused."

"Yes but the child?"

"For M. To ensure her behaviour."

"What are you up too Franz?"

"Me...what have you been up to dear brother. I think you are trying to keep her from me and that is not wise."

"Who is the child?"

"This child is the reason that I was delayed by many hours. I took me time to find the children of my future bride."

It hit me suddenly as I stood quickly but Franz pulled M's grandchild back against him as a small human shield.

"I know she will enjoy spending time with the girl when we fly to Morocco to get married."

"I destroyed your base in Morocco. Now give me the girl!"

"I had others and you missed one...or two...not to mention a few...very loyal men. They are with me down waiting in the car, now bring my bride to me and I will let you live." Franz said waving his gun hand in the air.

"You see James; I would rather you did live just because I want you to live with the misery. The fact that I have the woman you love in my bed and under my control. I will keep her granddaughter for insurance against any surprise attacks from you or MI6. M will become mine willingly and you will have lost everything, yet again." Franz laughed as if it were the funniest thing in the world.

I gripped my gun tighter but then opened my hand in surrendered and set it down on the table. I saw the dot of light from the scope reflected on my far wall and then Franz's head.

Franz didn't see it in time. He never expected the lone wolf in me to use the help of a friend. A very talented friend.

The plink of broken glass corresponded to the thunk of Franz's body hitting the floor. Eve really was an excellent shot...even after years of a desk job.

I surged forward and grabbed the child, pulling her up against me. I grabbed my gun off the table as I buried her face in my chest and ran for the door so that she did not have to see the body.

By the time I reached the street Eve was down from the roof of the neighbouring building. There were two dead men outside a black Mercedes. Eve looked confused about the child and packed her gun bag quickly in the boot of my car as I continued to hold the child.

"Eve...this is M's granddaughter." I handed her to Eve and she cradled the little girl, as I helped the two of them into the back of the car. Eve untied her and took the gag from her mouth as I drove.

I called into base and asked for a clean up crew at my flat. M got on the line…"Bond...what happened?!"

"Not now...I have a present for you." The little girl sprang to life suddenly after hearing M on the speaker. "Gran? But mum said Gran died...and we had to go to church and everything."

"Lily...is that you?! Darling are you alright?"

"She seems fine physically M...but you should call her parents." Eve said from the back of the car.

"I will see you soon sweetheart. James and Eve will look after you until then. I will call and have your parents come meet us soon."

I could hear M's voice crack with emotion. The fear and dread, once she realized who we had with us.

"I guess there will not be a gradual and easy reintroduction to your family M." I said.

"No. I will see you all soon. Bill's getting my children on the line and easing them into all this and allay their fears about Lily now."

I continued driving towards Vauxhall. There was not much in the line of traffic at 03:00 so we made good time. I pulled into the underground garage. Lily was now asleep resting on Eve. Tanner and M were waiting for us in the garage with some medical personnel.

"Oh Lily." M said looking more worried than I have actually ever seen her and that included bleeding from her wound after staring down a menacing Silva.

She was frightened yet resigned in that moment, when he intended killing them both together. M almost slipped away but I kept on her to live...for me...for everyone I could think of. I demanded that she fight the darkness and stay with me...for her work and biological family.

She had removed the wig again, likely to appear the way her granddaughter would have remembered.

"Gran...but mum said you were gone?" Lily was barely awake but smiled at M as she hugged her to her. The medic had a trolley and M placed her half asleep granddaughter on it and pulled a blanket up around her. They all remained silent as they pushed her into the building towards medical.

The doctor placed her in a room and turned out the light to let her sleep. "I will examine her more closely when she wakes. There were no apparent injuries."

"As far as I know she was taken but not drugged or anything. She must have been taken from school, she is still in uniform." I added as M looked worried and wrung her hands.

"Did you speak with your daughter?" "Yes...barely...through the shock and tears. Tanner sent agents and there is a team at your flat cleaning up. James is it over?"

"Yes...Eve redeemed herself. She made a clean shot and took him out. He thought you were there and I'm thankful you weren't. He was using Lily as a bartering piece to make you come with him. He was going to take you away to make me suffer and keep you and Lily in Morocco. Eve got his two helpers but he said that there was another base in North Africa somewhere."

"I'm on it." Tanner said as he left.

"Eve thank you. Go home and get some rest." M said as the new M arrived in the medical section.

"Olivia...I came in as soon as I heard. Your family is on it's way here under guard."

"Thank you M. Bond said we missed one base as well as his two accomplices." Olivia added.

"I will begin to look into it. I assume you're going to stay here tonight. They can pull a cot in for you if you like. Your children will be here by early morning."

"Yes and thank you M."

"Bond, your flat will be cleaned out by now."

"I'm not leaving M." I said slipping on the name and title, M frowned.

"There are two of us so maybe, with her permission you could call Olivia...by her proper name now."

"I'll keep it under advisement sir. But I have to say...it's much hotter calling her M." I said with a smirk hoping to shock the man. He pulled back a bit looking quizzically between us and then shook his head.

"I assume you are still...sentimental about 007?" M said to M.

"Yes...you could assume that." M said in a matter of fact way that made my heart glad to hear it.

I smiled and pulled her up against my side, holding her shoulder in my hand. "You should assume that."

"So it went both ways? Bond you are just as sentimental I see. Well that certainly sheds a new light on your behaviour the last year. I expected a normal grieving period but you...you were beyond that."

"Yes. I was. I had lost my better half."

"Well I am glad that you have found each other again and I will assist in any way to make it… easy for you to enjoy that retirement. Yes...I got your resignation earlier and I will ignore the fact you used MI6 resources and personnel since that resignation. Besides, you got rid of a very dangerous escapee."

"Yes I did. He will not take her or anyone else away ever again. If there are anymore members of Spectre out there at least the head of the octopus is gone and we can begin the rest of our lives."

M nodded, smiled and left us in medical. I smiled down at her but she turned away from me and watched her granddaughter sleep.

"I've missed so much."

"You can catch up now. You have a second chance. We have a second chance."

"Bond...I don't know if I can be what you want me to be."

"What do you mean? We care for each other and that is the best place to start." I moved to hug her but she moved to Lily's side and moved the hair from her brow.

"M?"

"I can't talk about this now James. As you said...we have time now. There is no rush and this is more important." M said looking at the girl in the bed.

I feel incredibly disappointed that M does not seem to be as excited as I am about the prospect of finally being together. Earlier she seemed more...involved with the plans...but then again it was before Blofeld attacked again. Maybe I'm pushing her too hard...I can't help it I love her so much that it's all consuming. I'm as obsessed with her as Franz was with me.

* * *

M snuggled into the bed with her granddaughter leaving the cot for me and fell asleep.

I sat in the chair beside their bed and dozed until a nightmare woke me. I couldn't really remember what happened but I assume Franz was successful in taking M, by the panicked beating of my heart.

Looking over at her sleeping with her arms around Lily made me smile. I was about to become a family man with no real benchmark for doing so.

Dear god...I wanted to kiss her and hold her so bad! To feel her up against me...stop it...not now. She's sweetly holding Lily in her arms protecting her in her sleep.

I will win the family over eventually. After all I managed winning over the hardest woman I have ever met. She loved and believed in me so anything was officially possible. To think that less than 24 hours ago I was fully prepared and that it could have been my last day on earth.

I heard noises in the hallway and moved to the bed. I gently placed my hand on M's shoulder and squeezed. "I think your children are here M."

M woke and eased off the bed slowly to not wake Lily. I held her arm and helped her gather herself before letting go. Not just because I was worried about her being disoriented but that I could touch her after so long, without objection.

She ran her fingers through her hair and came out with me to meet her two children. Judi and Ryan Mansfield where here without their spouses, as that would be too much for MI6 to warrant introducing to our operation.

Judi was a little taller than her mother but strikingly similar in appearance. Her hair was the same auburn of M's preferred wig. I had not been at the funeral to meet her, in my quest to kill everyone involved with M's murder.

Ryan was a tall lanky fellow with dark curly hair and an easy smile. Nigel must have looked very much like that when he was younger.

There was an intensity of emotions flooding around and Tanner and I withdrew and gave them the waiting area. I didn't want to leave completely, knowing that M had always said that her children resented her over the years.

"What are your plans with M...Olivia...Bond? Besides...your normal mission activities that is."

"I want to make her my wife if she agrees. If she doesn't want to then we will live together in sin, I suppose."

"I still can't believe it. All those women you've had during missions. Are they getting in the way at all?"

"Not so far but, I bet they get mentioned one by one on our first lover's spat."

Tanner laughed. "I am happy for the both of you. Look after her well 007. I don't want you breaking that special woman's heart."

I looked at Bill with my brow raised. "I wouldn't have thought that you care for her this much Bill?"

"I've worked in many places and with many people but she knew more and worked harder than you could ever know. Not to degrade our current boss but you agents were lucky she was your M."

"I wholeheartedly agree. What is the news on Spectre?"

"The two men Moneypenny killed are under investigation. There are a few other names of interest that 005 and 003 are hunting down as we speak. The service is now fully aware of the return of Olivia Mansfield from the dead and are motivated to tying up loose ends for her."

"Fantastic! We will remain in London for the time being and then...I have a house in Bahamas waiting for us in the cold winter months."

"That sounds idyllically fantastic Bond."

"Yes it does, but I have to pull out of the sale of my flat now." I said with a smile.

Bill clasped his hand on my shoulder and squeezed. "I for one am glad you'll both stick around for a while.

To be continued...


	12. Chapter 12

 

* * *

After M's family finish breakfast in the MI6 cafe, her children said goodbye. Her children stared at me; no doubt wondering about the quiet agent, who apparently killed for a living and who had introduced himself as their mother's lover.

I made sure to tell them that bit one on one, as to not embarrass Olivia further. I told them of my plan to marry her. Although, that shocked them, they're willing to be far more connected and loving towards her since her faked death. The loss of someone, even estranged will have that effect on you.

Tanner said that when the fake explosion took her life, the children finally found out all that their mother had been apart of for the last forty years. They had been gobsmacked; but that soon turned to pride and grief, for the mother they lost without ever understanding why she was away for much of their lives.

M didn't think she could ever make it up to them fully but I had a feeling that a vacation home in the Bahamas might help a great deal to healing whatever rifts remained. I invited them to Christmas in our tropical paradise with M's surprized nod of permission of course.

We finally left for my flat in the afternoon, completely exhausted from the emotional turmoil of the last day and late night. M still wore her wig at my insistence and for her general safety when we were in public.

I'll not lose her again and her being a target for anyone, had my protective instincts on overload. Every person on the street between my flat and MI6 was assessed as a possible threat.

I gave M the bedroom and fell into a fitful doze with my gun beside me facing the door. MI6 had cleaned the blood from Franz's death from my floor. The glass window had been replaced and a slight antiseptic smell hung in the air.

Hours later I was up but M was still sleeping. I was getting hungry and she would likely be the same by the time she woke. I decided to order some Italian food to be delivered, becuase I still don't trust leaving her alone for any amount of time.

I set the table and lit some candles as my buzzer rang. I paid for the meal and gave the man a tip and as I set the food on the table. I looked up to see M looking at me sleepily from the door way.

"You let me sleep the day away? I'll never sleep tonight." M said with a smile.

"That was the idea." I said lustfully as I rounded the table and pulled her into my arms. M pulled back a bit.

"M?"

"James...I...think...we need to talk. Not to mention I'm famished!"

"Alright." I said with some trepidation as we sat across from each other and dished out the bread and salad. I poured some wine as M placed the cloth serviette across her lap.

"James...I think you are moving too fast for me. It's just that this has all been...a sudden...very abrupt...reintroduction. And you already have us married and retired to the islands. All without really asking what I want."

"I'm sorry M but you didn't disagree at the time, so I just kept on with it. I cannot see into your heart and mind but I damn well know where mine is invested. Let's start simply. Do you have feelings for me?"

"Yes."

"I love you and will openly admit it. Do you love me?"

M paused and my anxiety rose. "I suppose...I do." She said with her eyes firmly on her fork and food in front of her.

"Well, try hard not to get over excited about it then." I said, peeved at her quick dismissal and partial answer. "You could at least look at me while you somewhat...reject me."

I know that I shouldn't be so abrupt and pissed off but I feel so strongly for her and she seems only remotely intrigued by the thought of me as her lover. Yes...I realise that I'm being petulant and arrogant in my assumption that she must want me as much as I want her. Which is desperately...all consumingly...urgently...heart beating harder in my chest...shocking even me, at the rate my body reacts to her presence.

M looked up with challenge in her eyes. "Do be reasonable James! It's not easy giving my heart away when I'm sure it will be shattered in a few years, or even less if your track record is anything to go by."

The sarcastic way she made that comment at the end made me clench my fists in frustration. "My track record...that's what this is all about?"

I could feel myself warming up for one doozy of an argument. "Ironic that I had to sleep with many just to satisfy **your** need to access their information, or get close enough to kill their husbands!"

Now I was trying not to get angry. But in my defense she was making it very hard to be civil, when she deliberately goaded me with a futile attempt to push me away.

"Fine then 007; let's talk about the women I did not send you to sleep with, they were far more dangerous to your case. This...supposed...strange...long term devotion to me anyway."

The sly bitch cornered me. M always could manipulate me into a corner, where I had to either agree and obey her or lash out and go rogue. I'm basically an arrogant...bastard of a man. I actively chose not to be agreeable. Even if she cornered me into a debate about past lovers.

"Nicely done M. What do you want to know? What they whispered into my ear? How smooth their skin was, or pert their breasts? Vesper's were larger than Maddy's and they were both confrontational like you." I met her stare with a glare of my own. I planned to push this...and far, to get her flustered and make her animated and flushed in that way. That way that always made my palms sweat as those cold blue eyes of hers cut into me like a hot knife through butter.

Pushing the proverbial knife in further, I continued on about Vesper and Maddie. "They also both disliked me in the beginning and hated what I stood for, as an assassin for Queen and country. That was until I brutally saved their lives then they were more than willing to throw themselves at me in thanks. Granted, Maddy fought hard against the foe and more than assisted me in killing him on a speeding train. And Vesper, well as you know she saved me from dying from digitalis poisoning in the car."

M merely nodded, seeming to become uncomfortable by my story. Good it was working! I want her off balance and out of sorts. Not only was it a massive feet to disrupt this woman it also was a fantastic way to make her slip...the mask of ice was dropping as the passion of arguing took hold of her. Christ she was divine when riled up!

"I heard you that night M; just before I…slipped away...'press the damn button' you said in desperation. As I faded away I thought to myself...she does care." M had the decency to look embarrassed for a moment but then glanced up with that predictable, yet sexy challenge in her eyes.

"Do not think for one moment...that I don't care for any of my agents! I am not made out of ice, like many would claim."

"Fine, I concede that point. So what you really need now are more details. You want to hear about Vesper and Madeleine?" I didn't give her the option to decline and went straight into descriptions, just to make her more uncomfortable and off balanced.

I really am a right awful bastard. I lashed out at her because she was about to reject me, after all that had happened between us over the years. I didn't want to disappoint, so I continued while she calmly sipped her wine between bites of lasagna.

"Our first couplings were fast and passionate much like any other. Gradually it moved to something more than a thank you fuck. But not like you and I would be, you rarely thank me for a job well done. The two of them could never compete with you in the bitch department M. Not only that; but both of them wanted me to change into something I am not and quit this life." I took another bite of dinner and I chewed forcefully as I glared at her. A challenge or dare for more arguments from the damn stubborn woman.

"I remember your resignation and Mallory told me that you almost walked away with Madeleine. Now you have quit once again, this time for an old woman. I did not ask you to give up this life, because I know how good you are and how they will need you."

She would toss loyalty to the crown at me, as a trite excuse. "I'm past 40 and this has been a long ride. I've the broken bones to prove it."

"And the broken hearts."

I frowned after M said that. "I will not do that to you M and you're just trying to push me away to see if I will leave you. What about your husband? Or any lovers you had? Do you have any more Silva's out their obsessing over you that I need to be worried about?"

"Enough!" M said angrily.

I loved the way her eyes flashed like dark blue ice in the candlelight. I wanted her badly and now!

"I know you think I'm only in this for a short term but don't you think that after this much time you could at least give me a try?" I'm just taunting her now. "Work out the kinks of your self imposed abstinence. For all your protests of being an old woman, I hear of men following you home from pubs and master criminals risking their lives just for a chance with you."

"That's beneath you Bond!"

"Yes it is! But I really want to help you...work through all this stress. I think you should try me, it's great stress relief and I'm an excellent masseuse.

M snorted and covered her mouth as she laughed while she ate. Her anger at my presumption dissipated with her amusement of my suggestion. A situation that I did understand, that she never expected to be in. Once she recaptured her breath and took a sip of wine she began again.

"Try you out...well that does sound fun. But you are the one who brought emotional baggage into this not I! If you had just wanted sex...that would have been easy for you to accomplish. I could say yes to a one off, now that we are not boss and employee. However, now you've made this about so much more than just sex. That's what surprizes me and makes me pause."

I'm completely shocked! She would have slept with me if it was for sex only...a one off?

I must look completely confused as M was smiling at me again but her eyes held the mischief and challenge of what could be. "You were shocked that day in the suite with Franz...that I admitted blatantly that I wanted you. You pushed me away after, only for your plan, or was it more? Were you scared of me M?"

"I did need to distance myself for the plan and yes...the intensity of your feelings shocked me that day. If you had said you just wanted to give me a try to get him going, I would have understood that. You are not the first to have workplace fantasies about the dominating woman in your life. Sex I can understand, it's base and serves a purpose like scratching an itch that requires scratching. But love...love is different entirely. It requires a level of trust that you and I keep failing at. I've lied to you and you've resigned and run away from me on many occasions. Usually with a stunning younger woman at your side. I trust you to act a certain way, accomplish certain tasks but do I trust you with my heart? This is the problem."

"But you lived with a man who knew little or nothing of this life. Was Nigel just a boring beard for work, to lend you credibility with the men upstairs! That's bullshit M and you know it!" I stood suddenly shocking her as I tossed my serviette on the table.

M's tone turned serious again. "You do not get to make disparaging comments about my husband nor our relationship ever!" That tone was final...I knew I had crossed a line with that comment. The vicious look in her eyes did not allow for anything further about Nigel Mansfield and his possible failings as a husband and lover.

"You push and push to try to get me angry enough to do something I will regret! Just so that you can justify me leaving you, as exactly what you had expected." I was trying unsuccessfully to contain my anger and all the while she just sat calmly...watching me melt down.

"But I'm not playing your games anymore!" Damn her! I cannot believe how much she can frustrate me in so short an amount of time.

"Good that is as it should be." M answered as she stood glaring at me from across the small table. Her look was a blatant dare to do...anything...say something to put the nail in the coffin of this fledgling relationship.

I breathed...panted really...as I tried to calm myself. I needed the time to rationalize all that was going through my head in regards to her.

"Are you seeing someone?" It sounded desperate and strained even to my ears.

"No, I have not since Nigel died, so I'm very out of practice with all this. I am content to remain on my own and in all honesty, it was what I expected."

"I'm done riding this emotional rollercoaster, so if you only want sex good! I will give you that all night long until you can't take anymore." I added with a smirk and a leer looking her up and down like I would any mark.

M visibly bristled as her arms crossed under her breasts. "I don't think it can just be sex between the two of us James. We are not wired that way. We've needed each other in ways that no one anywhere could ever relate too. This isn't just a May, December romance between us...it's different. You know that. I still can't see why you would want to bother with me at all?!"

"My god! If you want the list I can start with fierce loyalty and intelligence. Dwindle down to every physical aspect of you that drives me mad. The way your hair shines and creates a halo around you, to the sexy arch of your eyebrows. I have thought very nasty thoughts to divulge to you, just to see one elegant brow rise in response. Fantasies...a thousand of them that ran through my head at every meeting, on comms during missions and sitting outside your flat. Sitting in my car staring at your window like a bloody stalker! Wondering if I should dare wake you at three in the morning. I did that once...you remember...how could you forget. I was drunk but it was worth it."

"You had better not be lying James." M said as she thought about what I said. Her voice and attitude was softening towards me. Now I had to make this work.

"M I don't believe for one minute you are doing anything but pushing me away because of some antiquated notion of propriety. There is nothing in our way but this dinner table. There is a bed only paces from where we are and I've waited a very long time for this. And before you protest about your post menopausal body I've never wanted a woman more than you. Lines and wrinkles be damned, you are far more than physically beautiful to me." I walked around the table and took her hand in mine.

M looked up at me unable to speak. She swallowed and breathed deeply and I could see in her eyes that she was aroused by what I had said.

I leaned down about to kiss her but diverted my mouth to her ear, inhaling her perfume and whispering…"I want you."

I could see her physically shiver as she closed her eyes and leaned unconsciously towards me. I knew at that moment that she wanted me as much as I wanted her.

I swung her up into my arms and made it into the bedroom kicking the door shut with my foot as I carried her to my...no our...bed.

"So much for going slow." M managed with a smirk on her face as she laid on the dark grey covers propped up on her elbows. I began to toe off my shoes, frantic to undress and end this pent up, angst filled misery.

I began pulling off my shirt and paused to look at her. "I will stop the moment you say no. It may be the hardest thing I have ever done but I will stop."

I opened my belt as M's eyes rake my body. I can see her reaction, a catch in her breath as my trousers hit the floor and I stood before her, rock hard in just my tight black shorts.

"Dear god...what have I done to deserve this." M mumbled as a delightful rose shade invaded her face. She looked momentarily confused about what to do and began to unbutton her blouse.

"No...M...I would love to do that for you." I knelt on the bed beside her and placed my hands over hers. I deftly undid the buttons and helped her off with the blouse. She was wearing a dark navy blue lace bra and I stop moving as I lingered, enjoying getting to see her in this state. Then I gently kissed her neck, pushing her back on the bed, as I unzipped her trousers. I paused only to slide them down her legs and enjoy the view. The matching blue panties were somewhat of a shock. Not just for function, but for show.

"You knew this was going to happen when you dressed didn't you?"

"I don't know what you mean by that 007?" M purred as her hand moved up my length in my shorts. I had to stop her just to contain myself.

"I think you do M. You're a damn dangerous woman!" I growled, as my lips finally tasted hers the way I had always dreamed. I got so lost in just kissing her and caressing her that I didn't move to finish undressing her.

She tasted of warm sweet wine and our tongues intertwined lovingly as the passion built. The moment her moan of pleasure hit my ears I snapped back into reality.

I became extremely heated and an incredible urgency rose within me. I told her that I would try to go slow but I frantically took her panties down and bra off to see her bare before me. My hands became somewhat clumsy in my attempts to touch her everywhere at once.

I had slept with older women several times and it's true what they say, that women get better with age. M couldn't taste better if she were finest wine available.

It was indescribably amazing and I could no more convey what it felt like to finally make love to her, than describe the colour of the sky.

I cannot say I was at my best. I was to excited to give her my best but I damn well made up for it by the third act.

M was delightfully responsive and it made me ecstatic that, as she put it…'feels the need to make up for lost time'. Kissing her was beyond good, I'll never tire of it.

We took the night to learn about each other's bodies and physical needs. I treated her with kid gloves, not wanting to hurt her in my urgency. M assured me that any discomfort was just because it had been so long for her and it would get easier. And it did get easier and better and better as the night turned to early morning.

Dry spell be damned...she sure as hell was willing to make up for it. M was joyously vocal when well pleased and I have certainly found a retirement activity that would keep us busy and out of trouble.

I looked at her sleeping in my arms by 0300. What a couple of days to remember. First; the end of Blofeld and Spectre and now the consummation of years of verbal titillation and desire. I want to wake her just to kiss her again. So tired and oh so much more satisfied than at any other time in my life. This was what love felt like. Desire finally sated once lovers joined.

We may marry, we may not, but I'll be damned if I will leave her side anytime soon. I have never felt so at peace and secure with anyone in my life. I began to drift off and my only dream yet unfulfilled is making love to her on a beach near our new home in the Bahamas.

I can practically smell the salt air...see M in a sundress and hat...smiling at me...a nice dream...of our...future.

The end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank all of you for your kind reviews. It was interesting writing something in only one person's point of view.
> 
> :)


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